Who knows tomorrow could be the day.

Good nights sleep last night got woken up as usual by cramps in my arms, which means that I do not wake slowly.

It is more like being hurled than a soft sweet awakening and once awake sadly little chance of resuming sleep as every move even yawning provokes another cramping up of my arms.

Bad news yawning whilst doing the arm exercises as my arms go rigid and full of pain, it will take a minute or so to get them to relaxed again.

Most days its all over with happy slumbering once the rigid arms have woken me up but every now and then I sucessfully drift back off to sleep.

Happy days when that happens and I can shut out the reality of MS for another hour.

Who knows tomorrow could be the day.

Christmas eve 2008.

Did not realise in how much pain I was in until a dear friend Cari sykped me and asked me how I was doing.

Could not cope said first I am ok then said of course I am not ok I have MS.

As if she did not know that, realised when she abruptly ended the call that I had been really hurtful which was not my intention.

On explaining what happened to Richie found out that he has been feeling abit distanced from me cos I was keeping quiet about how bad I was feeling, Richie told me he prefered to know.

Not knowing made him feel shut out and isolated from me, not what I wanted to do at all.

Just tried to concentrate on the positive and not spend everyday talking about how much pain and discomfort I am in and the prospect of more of the same plus losing more functions.

Richie and I talked and cried together,then Cari and I talked and now I feel alot better and have resolved to talk more about how I am feeling and to not keep so much to myself.