Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Not brave just want my life.

People keep telling me that I am brave and I keep telling them that I am not brave.

Just trying to live my life through this horrible ordeal of progressive ms.

There has been no choice, if there were would have been I would have chosen anything else.

No choice posssible for me as I refuse to give up on my life and my love for my darling Richie.

In 2006 when the diagnosis was made, we thought it would be a slow progression.

But it has not been slow its gone fast.

Scarily fast.

Was not prepared for the constant pain, pain from the never ending tingling and electric shocks which start at my toes and goes up my body.

And it is progressing up my body.

Its got to above my waist now and that means that soon my arms and hands will not function.

Then I will use the headmouse to use the keyboard.

Not using it yet as while I can still use the keyboard prefer doing that despite the frustration of fingers that don't function well.

Can't believe this is happening to me and to Richie.

In 2005 when the fall at work broke the cartilage in my right knee did not realise that our happy life was being invaded by an unwanted visitor.

Did not find out until the next summer that the reason that my recovery was so slow was that it was ms.

The unwanted and uninvited visitor that won't leave again.

1 comment:

Diane J Standiford said...

Brave isn't something we ARE, i is something we must do. Hopefully the MS will calm down. MS sucks!