Permanent Damage To My Muscles.

Remedios Varo.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Remedios_Varo

Today is another beautiful sunny day, so far I have not started to lean to the left yet and have  managed to stay sitting wedged in by a multitude of cushions.

I am not looking forward to the really hot weather when I shall be roasting surrounded by so many cushions.

Looking forward to getting the extra support so that I can sit in a good position in bed, and not be almost lying on my left side.

Horrible feeling, the main problem with being well supported is that moving my arms is much more difficult to do and this makes typing really difficult as I can’t move my elbows.   .

The cushions are pilled up from under my armpits until my ankles, the cushions need to

also keep my knees upright and together, not flopping to either side.

The cushions stop the knees collapsing to both sides, which means that the my feet stay pressed up against the foam block at the end of the bed.

The deterioration in my torso muscles is because I had to stay in bed for so long, in all it was two years.

It took from august 2008 until august 2010 until the huge pressure wound had  completely healed up.

  

For two years I concentrated on the wound healing, I did not realise the extent of the ;permanent damage to my muscles.

I Need To Concentrate On The Positives In My Life And I Do.

Joseph Stannard.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Stannard



The other day I had a moment of totally clarity where I did a sort of mental double take as I thought that there is really no need for me to worry about what is happening and what will happen.

No need at all as I can not alter the course of my MS, so wish that I could but I can not do anything to stop the inevitable progression of the disease.

What I can do though is make my life easier by not getting panicked and not worrying both those emotions are so draining, they take away too much of my valuable energy.

Those emotions are too negative and instead of helping me focus on the moment keep me worrying about what will happen.

It was good to realise again that I can focus on the positives in my life and not the negative aspects.

This does not mean that I won’t recognise what is happening because I do; I am very much a realist.

Do not want to swap worrying and fabricate an illusion where nothing is wrong, not that I can do that as my body is a stark reminder of the effects of my MS.

As soon as I yawn my arms get all cramped up, so waking up and yawning makes for a horrible few seconds of being stuck as my arms weld themselves together.

My arm exercises help me to straighten my arms and use my hands, two very important functions for me.

Recently bee getting upset at the thought that my arms and hands will soon not be functioning well or maybe not at all.

How will I/we manage when that happens is a question that I can not answer now, I am sure we will see how to manage it when it happens.

For now my arms and hands work, typing is becoming frustrating as my little fingers constantly touch letter and numbers that I had not intended to.

Makes for a lot of editing but that does not bother me, I am glad and happy to be here, to be able to share my daily story in my blog.

The sun is shining just now and I am listening to some good classical music on BBC Radio 3, so much better than having to listen to gossip or about the Blitz on the other channels.

A sunny day like today makes all the difference to how I feel and right here and right now I am feeling good.

Going to enjoy my day very much, especially now I have clarified things for myself once more.

Why fight against myself when right now I need to concentrate on the positives in my life and I do.