Saturday, April 10, 2010
Diamonds and Nuggets of Gold.
Really amazing how quick a week goes, wonder if Richie telling me that the skin tear had healed made it go past swiftly.
It is after all a lot to do with feelings and perception of the world around, if I am not feeling well or am down time seems to crawl by.
Other times when there is good news or the weather is great, time can zoom by, this usually happens with holidays like Christmas and Easter.
It is funny how these days are a long time coming and then over before I even knew it, mind you when I was home in England with my parents these holidays seemed to go on forever.
Think that that was influenced by the fraught atmosphere at home, not one that was conducive to having a pleasant holiday or a pleasant any time.
Shame, mind you think that in the years since leaving home I have made plenty happy memories to more than make up for that sad time.
The memories of my life with my parents, in England have loomed large because that was a very important time for me.
When I look at it now, I see it was such a short time, that period between 1962 and 1969, seven years, but such vital years.
Looking at it now my big question is why my parents couldn’t have waited to move when I had finished my schooling.
Hate it when I hear people are moving just when their kids are making the transition from Primary to Secondary education.
It has been difficult for me on those occasions as my memories can just bubble up, I also can not cope if there is tension at the dinner table.
Hate witnessing meal times becoming a battleground, for little kids refusing food is often their only power.
Dinner times at home when I was a toddler, were dreadful, it was quite often open warfare between my mum and dad.
Plus all the scenes when I would not eat and all the shouting from them to persuade me to finish my food.
At my auntie Sigrid and uncle Abbie’s there never were those problems, it was always good fun there
Their attitude at meal times was ‘you are at your aunties so enjoy’ and I did and ate all my dinner without any problems.
Funny how a different attitude made all the difference, think it is important to realise that perception and attitude do make all the difference.
We were talking the other night about me being brave and very determined, guess it is still a surprise to me to be described in that way.
No longer argue against that description of me, as I am well aware that I chose and stay positive, it is my determination to stay consciously in the present.
Know that being like this is a hell of a thing to do and to achieve especially because my MS has progressed so quickly.
Life is shit in so many ways but in so many others beautiful, the MS is the shitty bit, but the friends I have made since I started my blog are the sunshine in my life.
My darling Richie is my diamond and our friends here and elsewhere in the world are my nuggets of gold.