Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Had another sudden awakening this morning, one minute there I was sleeping sweetly and the next fully a wake.
My nice dream cruelly snatched from me and the reality of being so painfully crippled really obvious as pain takes over.
Was transformed from sleeping sweetly to moaning in pain and trying to move around but could not move a fraction of my body.
Felt I was lying on a bed of knives and bees were swarming up my body stinging as they went and the whole thing was finished off with feeling electric shocks and my body burning.
Richie fetched some THC vapour as soon as I had inhaled the vapour all the pain and discomfort started to fade away and my body relaxed and I fell asleep again.
Woke up again at 10.30 and just as I started to cry Richie went to get some more THC vapour for me.
After that could do the arm exercises, have to stretch my arms before I start as my arms are always folded across my chest, whenever I am conscious of that happening I try to stretch them to stop this occurring.
As soon as I have done my arms Richie does my legs first leg exercises where he moves my leg and then massages my legs.
Needed extra exercises and massage as both legs were very tense and spasm quite abit this morning, in fact it was a huge leg spasm that woke me up.
Woke me up and pulled me down the bed quite abit, Richie pulled me back up the bed before he does the exercise routine.
After setting me up with the table and the Baclofen tablets and water he set up my laptop and I could get logged on to my blog.
Richie is making me a pineapple/banana and plum smoothie and then he will take the dogs out and come back organise lunch and zoom off to the supermarket for oats and other things and the Oriental supermarket and fish shop.
The Oriental supermarket is a good shop with lots of soya products, and beans and pulses as well as fresh Tofu and Tempe and around the corner is the best fish shop in the city.
Since I have been in bed because of the pressure sore Richie has been making sure I eat a lot of fish, as that promotes healing.
Luckily I like fish a lot and am quite happy to eat fish at least three times a week, fish and chips and fish pie and fish pakora are some of my favourites.
I have just inhaled some THC vapour to ease the pain, it is starting to have effect and I can feel my body getting less tense.
Hate to think how it would be without easy access to THC, the one time that I left the apartment without THC I had spasms all the way around our block.
So much so that virtually the first thing Richie did was to get me some THC as soon as we got back inside.
Richie is such a brave man, do not think that is what he thinks about himself, he constantly thinks that he is not looking after me well enough.
As if Richie could ever look after me badly, as if that could ever happen!
Madness to even think that as it is so very obviously not true, in fact the opposite is true Richie looks after me exceptionally well.
An opinion shared by Ton, the nurse from the Rehabilitation Centre Amsterdam, he thinks Richie is so good he was offering him work to go and look after others in the same situation.
Richie explained that he would not be able to look after anyone else as the only way he could cope with the pressure wound was because he loved me.
And without a love relationship he would not be able to take on the task as it would be just too much to bear.
Yet he has born all the responsibility for nearly a year now, it has been very hard on him, but somehow he has managed.
Sometimes at a huge cost to himself, sometimes when he did not know how to carry on, but has carried on.
He is my absolute darling, the love of my life.
And to think that there was a friend who thought it was not a good idea that he moved back in with me in 1997.
That was not a bad idea that was the best idea ever and has made us very happy indeed, so happy we decided to get married in 2001.
We are still happy together now despite the MS and all the changes this has brought to our life together.
Still best friends and still very much in love, my idea of a good time is eating food Richie has prepared like the lasagne he made fresh yesterday.
Including the pasta and sitting and enjoying the taste and trying not to choke as Richie has me laughing at his comments about events of the day.
Sitting talking and laughing with my darling is my idea of an enjoyable time and long may that continue.
Have a good day everyone I intend to enjoy today, now my sweet darlings are back from the park I can post some new doggie photos on Spike and Marleen’s blog.