Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Be Here and Now and Be Positive.

Psychedelic Mushrooms

Yesterday I finally sat for 30 minutes and did my leg exercises with the Motomed, it went very well.

Was quite tired afterwards and happy to be back in bed, we ate our dinner and relaxed watching TV.

Really nice and relaxed and ready to sleep when we discovered the bed would not go down flat so I could go to sleep.

Richie pressed the green button on the plug nothing and unplugged the plug, did both lots of times but nothing happened.

Started to feel very uncomfortable as the position was causing too much pressure on the back of my neck.

I was just saying we either call the emergency telephone number of the company the bed is from or I take a sleeping tablet.

At that moment the bed went down thanks to Richie not giving up and pressing the hand set for over ten minutes.

One more bag of thc and I went to sleep, the dogs managed to stay in the bedroom so we got woken up three times by Spike shaking himself, his ears sound like pistol; shots.

Luckily got back to sleep each time which was brilliant, think that was because I had finally sat in the chair.

Friday I had been too tired and Saturday we forgot and Sunday I did not want too do it, claimed it was too late.

So yesterday almost did not want to again but Richie persuaded me it was good if I did sit and it was good.

Even more aware that I will have to take it very slow and easy and take my time building up how long I can sit.

Now I have done it I feel confident and will sit everyday, feels good also deciding to go at my own pace with no deadlines to worry me.

Not having sat until yesterday had upset me quite abit, realised that this morning after a good night sleep, that it had stopped me from sleeping.

Thursday night I had no problem sleeping but did have a problem Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Have to remember that this happens and make sure to make my good intentions reality before I start to critize myself and give my self confidence a knock.

Need to build myself up and not take myself down, really be here and now and be positive and then I can and will enjoy my life.


Anonymous said...

It's hard to turn off that inner critic sometimes isn't it? I'm so glad that you decided to sit for a while! Oh, I know what you mean about the dogs' ears sounding like pistol shots, lol...When Winston scratches he hums a bit at the same time, which is hillarious, but not when it wakes me up!

Herrad said...

Hi Rain,
Lovely to see your comment, you are right it is very hard to turn off the inner critic.
It has been keeping me awake giving myself a hard time.
Last night it was gone because I had sat in the chair.
Spike makes a strange noise too when he cleans his ears.
They certainly keep us well entertained ou r dogs.
Have a good afternoon.

Stephany said...

Hi Herrad, just take it one day at a time, and make a short term outing goal, like just go outside for a few minutes and build up to that big list of shops and gigs. That way, it may not feel as overwhelming.

I think that happens to people in many situations, where a goal has been set, expectations are high, and energy is low to get there once it arrives.

Anyway, yes the dogs are good diversion for sure.


Nancy said...

When Lucy wakes up in the morning she "waggles" so hard that she bangs around the room bumping the furniture, her tail hitting walls - needless to say few could sleep through that! Which iI think is her intention.

Glad you are up and sitting. Please don't be hard on yourslef. You deserve kindness - even from you. I love Ritchie. Tell him your bloggy friends think he is wonderful! Have a great day Herrad. It has been way too long since I stopped by. I'll have to remedy that!

steve said...

You'll get there, Herrad. Getting the chair was a big step. And just like this past obstacle, the future ones will be knocked aside with grace and determination.

Work hard. Play hard. And get plenty of rest.

Lucy said...

Hi Herrad, I have been meaning to get over here and one thing and another it seemed. You can not be critical of yourself. I think that there are good reasons because an MS patient is so critical of themselves is because sheer frustratrion sets in.

Libby said...

yay for you (& richie!) herrad! one step at a time, you know...ms sucks, because it makes you not be able to do things at your normal speed, but it does teach you patience...unfortunately!

Charisa said...

Glad you got the bed to lie flat! I think we all need to remember to live in the moment more often. Have a good day!

Herrad said...

Hi Stephany,
You are right, we have to take it one day at a time.
Difficult sometimes, especially when you want something so much.
Sitting up again is good but also worrying.
Our dogs keep me well entertained, there is always a dog in the room when they are home.
Nice to have such attentive wee friends.

Hi Nancy,
Thanks for coming by, nice seeing your comment.
Your Lucy sounds very determined to wake you up when she is awake.
I shall pass on your message to Richie.

Hi Steve,
Thanks for visiting and for your comment, you are right future obstacles will be dealt with when they occur.
And thanks for your advice about working hard and playing hard, I do my best also to remember to rest.

Hi Lucy,
Thanks for coming by, lovely to see your comment.
You are right frustration at being like this does get to me.
I am determined to be gentler with myself.

Hi Libby,
Thanks for your visit, very appreciated, thanks also for reminding me one step at a time.
Easy to forget and want it all to go faster, which is not realistic.

Hi Charisa,
Lovely to see your comment, thanks for coming by.
It is not always easy to remember to be in the present but you are right we all need to be here and now more often.

Thanks everyone for coming by really appreciate seeing your comments.
It is very nice thinking of you all coming by.
The blog world is a good one, it has been very good for me these last 14 months.
Think it would be feeling like double the time without your support.
Have a good day tomorrow.

Denver Refashionista said...


You are very wise.

steve said...

Speaking of "Play hard", you and BR need to work on an adaptation of the Poak Chop Dance.

Webster said...

At first I couldn't think of why, after all this time and anticipation, you wouldn't want to be sitting in your chair, then I felt the "aha!" moment of understanding. It's been 14 months since you've been sitting. Such a long time. The effort involved with the new routine with the chair must be, well, exhausting. Really. Another layer of activity has been added to your (not quite yet) daily routine. And as with any much anticipated event, there is an emotional level to learn to deal with as well; new fears, old fears, all of that.

Give it time, but be persistent. You'll be comfortable in your chair in not so long. Baby steps. Take baby steps.

I really want to read your retelling of the first outdoor excursion, but I'm a patient girl.

Webster said...

Oh yeah, I almost forgot ... your psychedelic mushrooms reminded me; on the walk along the nature trail I took with my DH back in September, just off the trail there were several spots where some readily available 'shrooms were growing. He wouldn't let me pick one, though. LOL

It made me think back to my own experiences in the 1980's with them.

Herrad said...

Hi Nadja,
Thanks for your visit and comment.
Shroomtastic indeed!

Hi Steve,
Thanks for your visit and your suggestion, perhaps you can work on an adaption for us.
I can move my neck and head along to the beat but not much else.
Perhaps it will become a virtual reality dance.
Where we can pick someone to be us.

Hi Webster,
Thanks for your understanding, its exactly that I wanted it for the last 14 months and now its here and I can sit its scary and its knackering but doing it, twice now has made me happy.
I will keep doing it everyday.
Its as you said it is added to the daily routine but is not quite my daily routine.
Think it will take awhile before its my daily routine again.
I will keep doing it and keep persevering and hoping that soon it is the daily routine.
Shame you did not pick any mushrooms, there are so many edible ones.
Used to pick puffballs and cut then into big slices and fry in butter was delicious.

Thanks for coming by and making my day, its sunny now but looks like a last hurrah before a downpour.
Have a good day.

steve said...

I'll be virtual BR if Richie will be virtual you. I'm already working on "throwing my butter beans."

Herrad said...

Hi Steve,
Thanks for your visit and what an iresistable idea.
Wonder what throwing your butterbeans looks like sadly have forgotten to keep the link.
sob howl ohhhhhhhhhhh
Have fun praticing.

Anonymous said...

Hi we have so much in common. I am 35 and female from Trinidad. We both love to write, both have excellent support - your Ritchie and my Ian. MS.

Not even my mother understands my fluctuating everything..pain, moods,,,,hope and hopelessness. I am so frustrated that there is NO support in Trinidad. I lost my job after my most recent exacerbation. I am going to start small...maybe just a support group. God is GOOD Herrad, GOD IS GOOD.

Herrad said...

Hi Anonymous,
Thanks for your visit and comment.
Sorry to hear there is no support in Trinidad.
Does that mean that you do not get any help?
I think a blog would be a good way for you to deal with your MS.
Shame you do not have a blog, Blogger is good and free.
I recommend writing a blog, that way you can give and receive support.
Sounds like it could be a very good idea for you.
Keep staying strong.