Doing My Best.

Celestial Pablum. 1958.

Remedios Varo.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Remedios_Varo

Yesterday I was not only shocked by the blood clots, but by my constant collapsing in bed and having to keep asking Richie to adjust my position in bed.

Hate the fact that my muscles in my torso are now too weak to keep me upright in bed so that I need many cushions to prop me up.

As well as Richie adjusting me every 5 to 10 minutes, Richie was ok doing that for  me, as many times as I needed.

I hate the fact that no sooner has Richie sat me up well that I immediately start to lean to the left.

This feels so horrible, especially as I can not do anything to alter my position even when I am practically lying on my side.

Not easy to type or do anything when I am slowly sagging to the left, until I have collapsed, I try very hard to stop this happening.

But there is nothing that I can do, and that is something that I really hate, that I am totally powerless to do anything to help myself.

Being able to sit up in bed seems a thing of the past right now, I will be getting a set of cushions, like a sort of cocoon to support me sitting up in bed.

It is another lovely  sunny day which despite feeling so bad  I am doing my best to enjoy though it is not easy.  ..