Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Doing My Best.

Celestial Pablum. 1958.

Remedios Varo.

Yesterday I was not only shocked by the blood clots, but by my constant collapsing in bed and having to keep asking Richie to adjust my position in bed.

Hate the fact that my muscles in my torso are now too weak to keep me upright in bed so that I need many cushions to prop me up.

As well as Richie adjusting me every 5 to 10 minutes, Richie was ok doing that for  me, as many times as I needed.

I hate the fact that no sooner has Richie sat me up well that I immediately start to lean to the left.

This feels so horrible, especially as I can not do anything to alter my position even when I am practically lying on my side.

Not easy to type or do anything when I am slowly sagging to the left, until I have collapsed, I try very hard to stop this happening.

But there is nothing that I can do, and that is something that I really hate, that I am totally powerless to do anything to help myself.

Being able to sit up in bed seems a thing of the past right now, I will be getting a set of cushions, like a sort of cocoon to support me sitting up in bed.

It is another lovely  sunny day which despite feeling so bad  I am doing my best to enjoy though it is not easy.  ..


Anonymous said...

patience, strength and good thoughts for all of you.

Webster said...

MS is just one damned thing after another it seems. Unfortunately, it's all happening way too fast for you. I hope Spring hurries up and brings you nice days so you can go outside and enjoy the sun on your face, and visit people at the market. I'm always thinking of you, dear Herrad.

Travelogue for the Universe said...

I Hope today is better. Best wished to you both.Love, Mary

Herrad said...

Hi Robert,
Thanks for your good wishes, patience is not easy but I am doing my best.

Hi Webster,
Agree there is always something with MS, hate how fast everything is happening.
Spring is here and I am looking forward to getting out in the sun.

Hi Mary,
So far today is better and I am sitting ok for now.

Thanks to you three dear friends for coming by, good to see your comments.

Amrita said...

Ohhhh that ' s not good. Hope you are feeling better today

Jeanie said...

I hope you are able to sit outside in the sun soon too Herrad. I had a peaceful and warm day in the sunshine here in the English Lakes. At long last signs of spring are all around. I'm sorry to read that you are needing more support. How determined you are to keep writing. You are an inspiration!
Sending you positive vibes and prayers.
((((Gentle Hugs)))
Jeanie xx

Herrad said...

Hi Amrita,
Thanks for your visit and comment, I am feeling better today.

Hi Jeanie,
Thanks for your visit and kind comment, I am hoping to sit in the sun too.

Thanks you two dear friends for coming by.