Saturday, November 27, 2010

Not Easy But It Is My Best And Only Option




Spike's New Wheelchair.
 

It is getting very cold here already 2 degrees here which has not happened for many years.

Since 2000 the winters have been milder and damper, so snow falling briefly and it being this cold already in November has not happened here since 1993.

Just sent a reply to a mail I received from a lovely friend whom I met at a yoga holiday in Devon in 1973.

Can’t believe that is 37 years ago, that saying ‘time flies’ is so true, 37 years ago we met at this wonderful holiday in lovely Devon.

Very good to still be in touch with Pam, keeping in touch with friends has always been important for me.

Guess it must have something to do with leaving Trinidad like we did, where I was not told we were going for good.

I just thought seeing as we had been to Europe twice on holiday that was what was happening again, I was actually looking forward to seeing my German cousins.

But not at the expense of all my friends and big family back home in Trinidad, would have been pretty upset had I known, but would have written down friends names and addresses.

As it was I did not have an address book with all my friends’ addresses and I never heard anything from any of my many friends after we left Cascade, Port of Spain, and Trinidad in 1962.

Still wish that somehow I could find people who remembered me in Trinidad, be so good to hear from my childhood friends from Port of Spain.

It was not nice at all, suddenly having no friends was horrible, remember it well, and guess all these thoughts have been triggered by Pam’s mail and thinking of all my friends

Feeling very sensitive today, tears have been shed at the loss of all my important childhood friendships plus the loss of movement in fingers, hands and arms and my torso moving too much.

Very worried that since the supra pubic catheter operation my condition seems to have got worse.

I now need even more adjustments in bed, than I have needed, as I am constantly moving and slumping as well as my body getting very skewed, it is not easy sitting in bed anymore..

Not nice to feel my hands, fingers and arms not functioning as well as before the operation, very scary especially thinking that relatively soon those functions will cease altogether.

I am very scared, but as there is nothing that I can do to stop the progression of this incredibly unpleasant and unpredictable disease.

So I am trying my very best to keep calm and remain cheerful and positive and enjoy the moments, not easy but it is my best and only option.










10 comments:

Stephany said...

Hi Herrad,

Richie is there, friends and more Internet friends from around the world, all to remind you that you are not alone, though you are suffering you are still you.

HUGS

Have a nice evening!!

Spike in his wheelchair so you can watch him run, and he can enjoy life in a new way too, life is great w inventions like these!

JC said...

I'm sending you a Big HUG !!!!!

FrankandMary said...

Herrad,

I cannot think of anything to say right now, but yet I want to be supportive...but sometimes no proper words come to me....

Karen said...

Hi Herrad,

I read that MS symptoms may worsen after an operation or illness. Patients who have muscle weakness and who have been confined to bed for more than several days, may find it harder to recover from surgery. Physical therapy is often useful in these instances, and should be started as soon after surgery as recommended by a physician. I'm hoping that with some more rest and your therapy, you may regain the arm and hand function you had before surgery.

Spike looks like he has adjusted to his wheelchair well.

Hugs,
Karen

Stan said...

Robo-Spike appears to be getting around pretty well.

"I'll Be Back, woof woof"

I'm now anxiously anticipating photo's of the chair races you'll be having...

Not that I would place bets on such endeavors...lol

Always hoping you are having a wonderful day my friend.

Anywho, remember the cold days are just there to remind us how great those sunny and warm ones are..

Take good care..

Gareth said...

Hi H@R thinking of you ALL BIG STRENGTH LOVE @ HUGS GXXX ps sent you a mail

Herrad said...

Hi Stephany,
Thanks for your sweet supportive comment.
Hugs.

Hi JC,
Sending thanks and a big hug back.

Hi Mary,
Thanks for coming by and being supportive.
Know exactly what you mean about being at loss for words.

Hi Karen,
Thanks for your helpful comment, will start ding more arm exercises that may help.

Hi Stan,
Spike has finally had a good time i the park thanks to the wheelchair.
Thank for your very kind comment.
Good words about the weather.

Hi Gareth,
Thanks for your support.
Big hugs.

Thanks to you 6 dear friends for coming by, good to see your supportive comments
Really needed your support today especially.
Love,
Herrad

Webster said...

Hi Herrad, Glad that Spike is taking so well to his hew wheelchair. He sure looks cute in it. I'm sorry that your hands are being uncooperative. Let's hope that it is a result of having just gone through a minor surgery. But if it's not, just remember that it is what it is, and that's all it is. You are dealing with this nasty MS better than anyone I know. There's nothing wrong with a few tears now and then - as a matter of fact I think they are necessary to relieve the pressure and pain of all the loss. If you have questions, ask and I'm sure someone will come up with suggestions for you. That's the magic of the internet. I also wish we lived close, like neighbors. We would have so much fun. Unless you (Richie) tried to serve me a sardine sandwich! Then all bets are off.

Travelogue for the Universe said...

I hope you feel better after all the stress and anesthesia wears off. Every change is so hard. Have a great week. Love, Mary

Herrad said...

Hi Webster,
Thanks for your visit and supportive comment, much appreciated.
No sardine sandwiches for you so no worries.

Hi Mary,
Thanks I am feeling better today, even though it was a light anesthetic it still had quite an after effect.
I sent the urologist a mail thanking her and her team and got a response from her yesterday evening.

Thanks to you 2 lovely friends for coming by.
Good to see your comments.
Keep warm.
Love,
Herrad