Tuesday, June 30, 2009






Awoke at around 6 am for the first time it was nice and cool fell asleep again until 10 am.

That was very pleasant indeed and today for the first time in days did not start to weep.

At 10 am it was still good fresh air with a gentle and constant breeze which made life good.

After my arm and leg exercises and leg massage took thc and baclofen and ate a mango and did not want to do much apart from visit and read other people's blogs.

Had a very good time and happily ate a few tamarind sweets and sipped lemonade which was very pleasant.

Marianne came round as she does evry Tuesday this time she brought me a delicious mackerel roll and we both enjoyed the lemonade, Richie had just made it and she was astounded how nice it was.

The bearable weather lasted until 3 pm and then the temperature went bananas.

Now I am going to stop have some thc to get ready to be rolled around so Richie can put the sling on me so he can hoist me out of bed for a quick shower.

Might write more later but this could be it for today.

Tomorrow intend to organise some things so that they do not keep bothering me and I can enjoy all I can of this summer.

Hope you are all having a good day.

Take care to keep cool.

Monday, June 29, 2009






Tomato and potato plants on balcony.


This heat is knocking me out and making all the aches and pains more intense, it is because it is hot humid weather.

If only it were hot and dry think it would be easier and better to cope with, but hot and humid intensifies the MS symptoms.

Shame as I used to love it being hot, the last few days have been agony and at night it gets very late before we can get some relief from the all enveloping sticky heat.

Just got interrupted so have totally lost what I was going to write about which is probably just as well.

Glad I realised on Saturday that it was the sticky heat that was getting to me and not that I had totally inexplicably lost the plot big time.

One of the things I have never been too fond of has been an over concentration on every aspect of every moment in time always thought that over analysing everything meant you would miss out on the moment itself.

Now I realise that there is a middle way that it is good to examine and evaluate what you do but not good to get so stuck in looking at one aspect you do not see more of the whole picture.

In fact you can get so involved in the detail that you can forget anything else including yourself.

The fast progression of the MS makes it difficult for me to nurture good feelings about myself and has meant that my self image has been to hell and back.

Important to have one and one that is not just being an invalid, mind you as invalids go I am well loved and cared for and well nourished.

I am reasonably cheerful, love teasing the dogs gently, mostly pretending that I have thrown the ball or toy.

Love my darling Richie so vey much in awhile he will be in here hoisting me out of
bed and under the shower.

Looking forward to that very much and hopefully the shower will refresh me even if only briefly.

Later when I am back in bed I will seek some mental refreshment and stimulation and information by reading some the blogs I follow.

Recently I have come into contact with two people from Trinidad, Sita is in Ontario and Rhapsody Phoenix in Toronto.

http://sitahenderson.blogspot.com/

Trinidadian recipes.
http://www.trinigourmet.com/


http://rappingonamelody.blogspot.com/


Have had the pleasure of bonding with Sita about the pleasure of Trinidad food, we both were remembering the smell of hops bread.

Shame you can not describe a smell, all I can say is it is a unique smell which I can not explain.

The smell of Hops bread is something another Trini will understand very well indeed, a lasting memory of mornings at home in Cascade, Port of Spain and my dad coming back form getting the morning rolls.

Going to leave a supportive message on Amelia’s blog she has her very first infusion of Tysabri tomorrow.

http://talesoflifewithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/


Wonder how Kimberly is doing over at http://myjourneywithms-kimberly.blogspot.com/


And how Rae http://myweathervane.blogspot.com/

And JC http://jcatmom.blogspot.com/

And Anne http://disablednotdead-anne3.blogspot.com/ are doing

And check out her new blog http://vitaminsmineralssupplementsdiets-ohmy.blogspot.com/

As well as Stephany http://bipolarsoupkitchen-stephany.blogspot.com/

And Celeste Maia at http://maiasintothemoonlight.blogspot.com/

And Diane http://dj-astellarlife.blogspot.com/

And Lille Diane

http://www.woodstocklily.com/

And Rain http://rain-mountain-mamma.blogspot.com/


And Tara at http://livingdaytodaywithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/

And Mort at

http://mortonlake-caring-and-sharing.blogspot.com/


Well guess it is time to stop and get shnowered r i ght away.

After the shower will post the photos, the pictures that I will post today are our tomato and potato plants, the potato is in the square box.

Hope you are all having a good day..

Sunday, June 28, 2009











Pictures from Wales from Gareth.

Had a down day yesterday, think that the heat was the main reason for that by early evening really felt I had enough of all of this.

MS really does suck not only do you have to put up with all sorts of shit but it also fucks around with your physical appearance.

Just thinking yesterday how shitty it is, to not only lose the facility to move, but to lose body weight at quite an alarming rate.

My body is totally different now, legs are very thin, and so were my arms, like twigs last August but have built them up abit with 30 minutes exercise everyday.

Sadly can't do quite much for my legs, do use Motomed for the legs for 30 minutes every day.

Just did not expect my body to change so drastically, I was 5 ft 6 inches and medium build.

Now there is much less of me, to me it is like night and day how I look now compared to 2006.

There has been a pretty drastic change then I looked like an attractive woman in her fifties now I look like an invalid in her late sixties.

My breasts have vanished, my bum went last year and my face went quite gaunt it is hard to come to terms with these changes.

Really hard and quite a big shock which is not easy to come to terms with so quickly.

Not easy at all is an understatement if there was one.

Suppose if I look at it logically then I should have realised that being inactive means muscles are not being used and therefore they become slack.

This stands to reason it is just I did not expect such drastic changes in how I looked.

And this of course influences how I feel, which is not happy that my self-image has taken such a pummelling.

Am determined to rise above this but this will cost me dearly and it hurts like hell
that this too has been taken from me.

It is amazing how much the body and the mind can take, quite amazing really.

Have been thinking alot about the past and realise that for me it really is all gone now.

There are lots of questions that have become self evident now especially when looking back and discussing the events with Richie.

Some things for which there are no answers as I can't ask my parents anymore and others because events have long since overtaken them.


Today right now can’t imagine wanting to be around for too much longer not if I am 24/7 in bed, had not realised the effect being in bed has on the body and on the mind.

As the muscles are not being used everything gets slack and starts to ache from the constant pressure of lying in one position.

The mattress constant changing pressure stops me getting pressure sores on the rest of my body.

In some ways I can see that I could survive ok indefinitely in bed if it were not for my muscles.

If it were all down to Richie’s love and care I would be restored now I am convinced of that, Richie’s love and care is absolutely wonderful.

His care has made this very long period in bed bearable; knowing that he is there for me has made all the difference for me.

Think that this very hot and sticky muggy weather is very hard for me and I may also be down because of Michael Jackson’s death.

Will do my best to lift my spirits by reading other blogs and posting comments that prospect makes me feel better and the fan is helping me too.

Hope everyone is having a good day today am determined I will too, perspective is everything think mine is back to looking for the good things in my life.

Saturday, June 27, 2009





Got woken up this morning by a parakeet who seemed to have visited the bird feeder to shout up the neighbourhood.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/6478911.stm

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/science/article1550997


Later on asked Richie about the bird shouting and he said that he had looked at the birds twice and each time the one making all the noise did not seem at all worried by Richie.

He flew off and came back, according to Richie there were two, an older one eating peanuts and a young one who had no clue how to get hold of the peanuts.

Eventually the birds flew off and we both got a bit more sleep, really glad Richie had totally opened the one window.

There was no sign of a breeze woke up because of the shrieking bird and became aware then quite how sweaty and damp I was.

Luckily managed to sleep again, in fact managed to do so twice which is brilliant good luck.

Lay here thinking how strange it was that Michael Jackson was dead, funnily enough as soon as I saw the news that he was rushed to hospital after a heart attack.

Thought right away he may not recover from that, this was because Nick died of a heart attack in hospital, so immediately thought what if.

Just never expected what if to happen right away, was really fast, for a moment felt that maybe I should not have thought he might die.

Obviously did not know that my thoughts were so powerful.

Since I inhaled the thc have felt a lot better, the arm exercises are quite tough these days but well worth doing so are the leg exercises and the leg massage.

All help to relax me and make it easier to cope with the pain.

Wish I could have told MJ that cannabis was much more effective way to cope with pain than the cocktail of opiates he used.

Very sad that he died before he had even done one performance, now no one will have seen him come back again.

Poor Michael and poor us, we lost a fine performer who just wanted to be loved and did not realise that he was loved by so many.


Friday, June 26, 2009





Please will you all visit Amelia's blog today and give her some love and support.


http://talesoflifewithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/

She is in alot of pain and discomfort and is waiting nervously for her first Tysabri infusion on Tuesday 30 th of June.

If you also use Tysabri perhaps you can visit Amelia and ease her worries.

Saying hello with as many people as possible would be brilliant.



Poor old Michael Jackson all that talent lost, according to the newspapers it was prescription drugs that caused his death.

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/michael-jackson-the-final-decline-of-a-pop-legend-1720267.html

http://www.michaeljackson.com/


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Jackson

http://www.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUSTRE55P1Y020090626


The star had been popping pills, including anti-anxiety drugs Xanax and Zoloft and painkiller Demerol, for weeks before his death.

It seems that an injection of Demerol had caused respiratory and cardiac arrest and after an hour trying to resuscitate him the doctors at UCLA officially announced he was dead.

Very sad death of a former child star and pop super star, sure many are sad about his death, me too, as I think of what could have been.

Shame he did not have the life he needed to have instead of that strange half life of being in the limelight that robbed him of his childhood.

Sad that again it was prescription drugs that were responsible just like with Elvis and Anna Nicole Smith.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elvis_Presley
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Nicole_Smith

Thursday, June 25, 2009




I would like to pass the A Hoy Award to a wonderful new blog and to a wonderful woman.

I am very impressed with this blog and would recommend you take a look.

Celeste Maia@

Maia’s Into the Moonlight.

My name is Celeste Maia. I am a painter, a writer and illustrator of children’s books, a wife, a mother and a grandmother. I was born and grew up in Mozambique and studied in South Africa, France, and the United States. I have shown my work in many countries on four continents. I love to travel, to read, to swim, to listen to introspective music and watch intelligent movies. I am attracted to the color red. I enjoy cooking and eating well, being with friends and having a good laugh. I will be writing about painting and esthetics, living with CLL, food, places I travel to, random thoughts and photographing along the way. I look forward to sharing reflections with you. You can see more about my work and my complete profile at

http://maiasintothemoonlight.blogspot.com/


Please pass to 5 other blogs.
Two of those must be new to you.
Post and mention who gave you the award with their url.
Then go to each blog you pick and ask them to come by your blog and pick up their award.

As Matt from A Hoy says:

http://threegoldsinonetournament.blogspot.com/

I'd like to think that receiving A Hoy will be different to most blog awards, because of the stipulation that one makes an onward award to at least two blogs that one has never seen before.

It's a psychological thing.

Suddenly having somebody turn up, out of the blue, and say "your blog's cool: have an award," has significant positive impact.

I know this, because when I receive awards, I make a point of searching for blogs I've never seen, which are "off the beaten track" of stuff that I usually look at, and the responses are
worth the extra effort.

This is, I would argue, also beneficial to the giver, because it requires them to think of things that they like - and you'd be surprised how few people think in those terms.

The award is called the A Hoy for Chris Hoy,the best track cyclist

http://www.chrishoy.com/wp/chris-hoy-biography.


I received The Bow Award from Lucy@

What is left of a whole new life

I am married, had 5 children. 4 boys and 1 girl. Oldest is deceased. 9 grandkids,10 great grandkids.I love hearing from people, and have made some true friends on the blog, (I think) I hope. We have a fat beagle named Spunky 5 years old and spoiled rotten, but we are huge dog lovers.

http://whatlifeisabout-lucy.blogspot.com/

Lucy's blog is well worth a visit.


The Bow Award for Outstanding blogs, blogs that inform the mind and expand the horizons.

Please pass to as many other blogs as you like.
Post and mention who gave you the award with their url.
Then go to each blog you pick and ask them to come by your blog and pick up their award.

Marie@
Nourish: Living, Laughing, Winning.
I am just like you - on the journey, coping with Multiple Sclerosis, putting one foot in front of the other and trying to find the best way possible to do so, with a little help from my friends.
http://nourishourselves.blogspot.com/


Cathy@
Navigating the Journey of MS
My life with Multiple Sclerosis and Tysabri
http://navigatingthejourneyofms.blogspot.com/


Amy@
MS~LOL: Multiple Sclerosis a Life Of Learning.
http://mslol.wordpress.com/


Deb@
Living-With-MS
Living with multiple sclerosis is like a box of chocolate. You never know how it will affect you the next minute, hour, or day. I refuse to let MS control my life...what about YOU.

http://living-with-ms.blogspot.com/


Julie@
Maybe I'm Just Lazy: One Woman's Journey Through MS and Life
In September '07, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. In an effort to maintain my sense of humor while integrating this new reality into my life, I started this blog, which has become my public journal, an opinion column, and a rough draft for my book. MS prompted this project but it's also about life in general. My life, that is. I welcome comments--even the negative ones. They make me think. (Although I think more of those with names attached.)
http://lazyjulie.blogspot.com/


Me@
MS.
I found it! This has been a guiding principle for me since I read it: "It's what gurus call higher consciousness. Biologists call it altered states. Psychologists call it super-sentience."..."And Christians call it answered prayer. Sometimes, divine revelation simply means adjusting your brain to hear what your heart already knows." --Dan Brown 'Angels & Demons'
http://txphoenix.blogspot.com/

Hope you all visit these excellent blogs.

From CNN


Women have taken to the streets of Tehran. This shows the new face of Iran,


Iranian women stand up in defiance,and flout rules.

June 23, 2009.

A young Iranian woman named Neda is gunned down in one of the most iconic images of the last week. Another walks down the street, defiantly showing off her hair and body in a revealing dress. And still another woman says she's not scared of paramilitary forces -- no matter how many times she gets beaten.

Women have taken to the streets of Tehran. "This shows the new face of Iran," one expert says.

‘’ When they want to hit me, I say hit. I have been hit so many times and this time it doesn't matter. I just want to help my brothers and sisters," says the 19-year-old woman whose identity is being withheld by CNN for her safety.

Amid the clashes and chaos, there has been a recurring scene on the streets of Tehran: Women, in their scarves and traditional clothing, at the heart of the struggle.

Some are seen collecting rocks for ammunition against security forces, while video showed one woman trying to protect a fallen pro-government militiaman wounded in the government crackdown.

At Shiraz University, riot police clubbed women dressed in black robes. "Don't beat them, you bastards," one man yells.

When security forces come to attack, the 19-year-old woman protester says she looks them in the eye and asks: "Why do you kill your brother? Why do you hit your mother, your sisters?"

"We all tell them, if you're Iranian, you shouldn't do that to your people, to your own country's people," she told CNN by phone.

Watch woman stand up in defiance to power.

But it's the woman known as Neda who has become the symbol of women on the front line that has galvanized opponents of the Iranian regime.

In a widely circulated video, Neda is seen in the middle of protests over the weekend.

She is shot and drops to the ground. Blood runs from the side of her mouth as a few people, including her music professor traveling with her, press on her chest and shout her name.

One pleads, "Do not be afraid. The camera closes in on her face as her eyes roll back and are still.

Karim Sadjadpour, an associate at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace, said the image of Neda and other women at the protests showed the difference from the 1979 revolution.
"The iconic pictures from the revolution 30 years ago were bearded men. This shows the new face of Iran -- the young women who are the vanguards of Iran."

Abbas Milani, the director of Iranian Studies at Stanford University, agreed that Neda was becoming a symbol for all the women who have become involved in the turmoil that has followed the disputed election.

"She will become the image of this brutality and the role -- the truly significant role -- that women have played in fighting this regime.

I think that women are the unsung heroes of the last few years. They are the ones who began chipping away the absolute authority of the mullahs."

The protests haven't just been confined to Iran's everyday women. The daughter of former President Ali Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani was arrested over the weekend while taking part in a protest. She was later released.

In addition, Zahra Rahnavard, the wife of Mir Hossein Moussavi, whose apparent defeat in Iran's presidential election has sparked the unprecedented demonstrations, campaigned for her husband, an unusual step in politics in Iran. Her public support of his candidacy underscored his professed support for women's rights. Learn more about the timeline of events.

And in another act of defiance, apparently from after the election, a woman who appears to be in her 20s or 30s walks down a street in Tehran, showing off her body in a revealing dress and displaying her long, curly hair. In Iran, women are forbidden to show their hair, and they must keep their bodies covered. "Lady, is it a revolution already?" one female driver says as she passes by.

The 19-year-old demonstrator, who spoke by phone with CNN, says women are out in the streets in much larger numbers than men. She provided CNN with images of paramilitary forces on Saturday confronting protests, just before she was beaten. She says she was beaten again during protests Monday.

"The women are all together and they say, 'We're going to stay here.' There are so more [women] than men," she said, referring to the number of women protesters. "Until now, the women didn't have a chance to express themselves, to say that we are important in our country's future. But now, they can play an important role in our freedom. It's a good chance for us."

Is she optimistic?
"I'm absolutely optimistic, because history has taught me that all the revolutions start like this," she said. "Every revolution has violence and some people die, but nothing stays like this forever."

Wednesday, June 24, 2009








Gareth's garden in Wales.


Have been very fortunate this past week to be able to sleep until 10 am in the mornings.

It has been brilliant and of course I am hoping this will carry on for a long time.

The other thing that has been wonderful is not waking up shrieking with pain like I was doing before.

Maybe the gentle warm weather we have been having is good for me, notice when it got alot hotter I was having a hard time unless the fan was on and directed at me.

Would so love to live somewhere that had mild good weather all year around think it would be very good for me.

I guess could take it hotter as long as I could acclimatize and it would be constant temperature.

Oh well that is not here so have to enjoy this while it is summertime and keep the sun alive in my memory for when the cold days come back.

Find often get a touch sad just after mid summer when I realise that is us at the top of summer, the shortest night.

Now we are counting down to the longest night of the year.

But first we have a couple of beautiful summer months ahead of us, two months to enjoy.

Really looking forward to several people visiting such as beautiful Darren who should be here next month.

Angela will be over for a week in August and in September my cousin Katrin, from France will visit.

Be nice to see them all especially Angela, she wanted to visit here alot more than just one visit last September but sadly her mum fell and broke her pelvis.

It took months for it to begin to heal and alot of time and effort on Angela's part to get support organised so her mum could go home again.

Had great news from Gareth when he was here recently, that he and Paul are also over for a week in September, which is the best news.

So nice visits to look forward to as well as small pleasures like the tamarind balls that Richie is making right now.

Hope they will be very hot and peppery just like Trinidadian Tamarind balls, almost can not wait!

Wow nice and hot just like 1ike Trini Tamarind Balls.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009











Wonderful weather for the beginning of summer, in recent years the start of summer has been very damp.

Wimbledon has usually been the signal for lots of rain and once it really starts it would often go on for two weeks just like Wimbledon itself.

It would also rain on St. Swithin's Day which meant forty days of rain so basically often that would be the end of dry summer weather.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._Swithun

This year is different and the 21 to 22 June has been very pleasant warm weather, be nice if it were like this all year.

Sadly not in Northern Europe which has in the past been very damp during the summer months something which can get me very upset.

Can get the half empty glass way of thinking instead of the half full glass which I do prefer.

It is amazing to see that perspective has a huge influence on us, guess because we are such emotional creatures.

Have really noticed that if I want to change how I do things I have to do it quite mechanically in order to learn the new behaviour and to start to imprint it on my mind.

Then when it has become something I am used to, when it has become a habit I do not need to make sure I do it anymore.

Was even like that when I decided that I would do my best to live in the moment this moment and enjoy all I can.

Had to initially remind myself that was what I was doing, almost had to say to myself '' enjoy this now ''

Certainly noticed the positive effects on myself but more importantly on Richie and everyone else in my neighbourhood.

Am amazed that looking back now can see that it was actually relatively easy to learn a new habit.

A habit which is good for me, also learned to ask for what I want, and ask clearly, found out that friends appreciate it.

Makes everyone’s life easier and that good feeling reflects back around so everyone benefits twice and more.

Really lovely.

Richie just fed me three strawberries from our strawberry plants, they were small but packed full of taste.

He also told me that the tomato plants were doing very well; he was reeking of tomato as he stood next to me.

Really exciting seems our potato plants are doing excellently too, hope the pepper plant does well too.

Well summer is bursting out all over hope the temperature does not go too mad as then the MS symptoms go abit mad.

Guess that will mean time to put the fan on constantly.

Have a good day I intend to, Marianne will be around soon with delicious things from the Suriname Snadwich Shop.

Will be getting a roll with pom (stewed chicken and cassava) and one with bakkeljauw (saltfish) and both with lashings of pepper sauce and a tin of sorsop or guava juice.

Really looking forward to it very much.

Best bit about today is that I did not wake up until pleasantly late at 10.30 and then my pain was quickly helped to subside with the application of several bags of thc and the baclofen, arm and leg exercisews and leg massage and a beautiful ripe Pakistani mango.

Richie is making lemonade and the dog biscuits he made earlier are in the oven giving the dogs who are waiting in front of the oven hope that they will get some soon.

Life in short is good today.

Have a great day.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Happy Summer Solstice









Stonehenge, England.

For more information on Stonehenge see:

http://www.stonehenge.co.uk/


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stonehenge

Sunday, June 21, 2009
















Once I started thinking about Trinidad I remembered various things like Hops Bread, these are big round rolls, crusty on the outside and soft and fluffy on the inside.

The smell of Hops Bread is different to any other bread smell, don't know why that is but it is true.

Smelt it again, that unique smell in 1997 when I visited Trinidad for the first time since we left in 1962.

Once I started thinking about Trinidad I recalled the first time I had eaten Trinidad food since our departure in 1962, was when I visited my half sister Carole in 1975.

I went to stay for the weekend at the house she was living at in Barnes, London.

Her ex had also just arrived from Trinidad, he had amongst other things avocados and mangos and rum and lime and tamarind balls with him plus chickens and okra and plantain.

He had most of the ingredients for a good Trinidad meal with him.

Carole made curried chicken properly; she burned the sugar, and then added the curry spices and chicken pieces.

She made coo coo which is a okra and cornmeal pudding left to set and either turned out of cups or one pudding bowl.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coo-coo

She also made rice and peas, with pigeon peas and side dishes of fried plantain and dhal and avocado and chopped cucumber with salt and pepper and vinegar.

Carole had also made my favourite mango pickle, which is mango and salt and pepper and vinegar and there was Matauk’s Pepper Sauce (Trinidad Hot Pepper Sauce)

This was a feast for me like I had not had for ages, this was down home food and after dinner we ate mangos and drunk rum punch and ate hot channas (roasted spiced chick peas) and tamarind balls (tamarind with hot pepper and sugar).

Will never forget this feast, this was such an important event for me when for awhile I felt a real connection with the place I was born.

That was also the summer my half sister’s took me to a Trinidad Gala Dinner and Dance party to celebrate the visit of Sir Garfield Sobers to England.

He had been the West Indian Cricket Team Captain, and was the best cricketer ever.

He was in the country to receive his Knighthood from the Queen.

The party for him was spectacular, Trini food and drinks in abundance plus I was introduced to the great man himself by my sisters and he asked me to dance.

Well Wow! I danced with Gary Sobers, the best cricketer ever.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Garfield_Sobers

These two things gave me back a tiny part of my Trinidad identity and in 1997 when I got back to my Little Island in the Sun I discovered it was really as beautiful as I remembered and still remember.

Some of My Favourites.



Jerry Lee Lewis is one of the founding fathers of Rock 'n' Roll. He was one of the original Sun Records quartet along with Elvis Presley, Carl Perkins and Johnny Cash who between them defined the moment.

Saturday, June 20, 2009















Am very thoughtful and quite dreamy now which is pleasant especially as I woke up crying today.

Do not know why, just woke up with an extremely wet face, had some thc and dried my face and did my arm exercises.

Which was really funny as had just said to myself no arm exercises today, and the next minute I am doing them intently.

After the arm exercises Richie did the leg exercises and massage and I took the baclofn tablets and some more thc and I was set to read the papers and my emails and blogs.

Had mailed Sita, she is also from Trinidad and she sent me a link to a clip she had posted on her blog and which I found right away on Youtube and posted on my blog.

The pictures on todays post are very influenced by thoughts of Saturday at home in Trinidad.

All ready to carry on enjoying Saturday in Amsterdam.

Hope everyone is having a good day wherever they are.


By David Rudder & Carl Jacobs

Trini to de bone

[intro]
Islands in the sun
Islands in the fun

[verse 1]
Welcome, welcome one and all to de land of fete
Trini to bone, Trini to de bone
When it come to bacchanal, well they can't beat we yet
Trini to bone, Trini to de bone
Look, sweet women parade abundantly
De bredren dey full ah energy
Some people say God is a Trini
Paradise and all convincing me
God gave us a spirit fiery
But nut’in in de world don’t bother we
But look a smart man gone wid we money
We still come out and mash up de party

[chorus]
(Sweet sweet T and T) Oh how I love up dis country
(Sweet sweet T and T) No place in dis world I'd rather be
(Sweet sweet T and T) Oh how I love up meh country
(Sweet sweet T and T) All dis sugar can't be good for me

[sub-chorus]
(Oh oh) From Toco to Caroni
(Oh oh) Maraval to Sans Souci
(Oh oh) From Scarborough to Buccoo Reef
(Oh oh) Profiling on Fredrick Street

[chorus]

[verse 2]All these years I spent abroad in de cold, longing to be home
Trini to bone, Trini to de bone
God I pray that some sweet day, I will no longer have to roam
Trini to bone, Trini to de bone
De problems we have are plain to see
We prove we could stand de scrutiny
All and all, a true democracy
How we vote, is not how we party
There's no place like home some people say
Though some have to leave to make their way
But in their hearts I know their destiny
To come home and big up they country

[chorus]

[sub-chorus]
(Oh oh) From Couva to Signal Hill
Oh oh) Arima to Charlotteville
(Oh oh) Matelot down to Port-of-Spain
(Oh oh) We playin' mas sun or rain

[chorus

bridge]
(rudder chant)
Look ah Trini gyal dey, she breaking away
Tobago gyal, oh what a bacchanal
De men gone wild, de wickedest style
De gyal look back, dey on de attack
De style just change, man re-arrange
De fete gone clear, cause nothing can compare to a Trini rising
Oh no no, nothing can compare to a Trini rising

[verse 3]
As crazy as we might seem to be
We still fight to be a family
Indian, African or a Chinee
Syrian, French-Creole and Portuguese
We vex with a spirit fiery
Some people say God is a Trini
Sweet women parade abundantly
Now de problem is plain to see

[chorus]

[sub-chorus]
(Oh oh) West mooring to Los Iros
(Oh oh) From Sando to Mayaro
(Oh oh) From Penal to Grand Riviére
(Oh oh) Sweetness in abundance everywhere

[chorus]

[end]
No no no no
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
Sweet T and T.


The opening track on the LP Jonathan Goes Country. A choppy album but worth getting for some great original tunes.

Roadrunner by Jonathan Richman





Recorded at Joey Ramone's Birthday Party at NYC's Coney Island High in May,1998. A rare live performance of Roadrunner by Jonathan Richman and original Modern Lovers bassist, Ernie Brooks.
Recorded at Joey Ramone's Birthday Party at NYC's Coney Island High in May,1998.

He was not a member of the Ramones,he was an inspiration to The Ramones.

He put together the band The Modern Lovers in 1970.

For more information about Jonathon Richman:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Richman

Friday, June 19, 2009









Was woken up at 7.15 by a group of workmen who were having very loud discussions outside the bedrooms of our building.

When Richie got up to close the window to shut out the noise I asked for some thc and once I had breathed it in I fell asleep again.

Wonderfully the pains I normally feel as soon as I awake did not happen then otherwise it might not have worked.

Slept until 10 am feeling better than yesterday, think that yesterday morning I was feeling so bad cos I could not have a poo the day before.

So the extra pain was due to an urgent need to go to the toilet, now I know this will insist on going earlier to the toilet.

Well whatever feel quite bright and cheerful today and am enjoying the sunshine.

Hope everyone is enjoying a good day today.

Thursday, June 18, 2009






Feel better in some ways than yesterday, although have discovered there are some pains that are not temporary but there all day and evening and in the night.

Luckily I can sleep through this which is great but finding it practically impossible to fall asleep once I wake up.

This morning it was the pain in my neck and just above, not the worse one that I have but bloody annoying as there is nothing you can do to relieve the pressure that is undoubtedly causing the discomfort.

The new pain is in my arms feels like something is wrapped tightly around the arm just by the armpit, its not very pleasant as it also feels like I am battling against a great force every time I lift my arms.

Yesterday was just telling Richie how nervous I was about the results from the lab and wanted to phone the Vets only for the phone to ring and it was the Vets.

We had good news about Spike, the little lump they removed was not malignant it was the result of a blocked pore.

It came as a great relief to both of us, think Spike and Marleen sensed that we were more relaxed and tried to milk it for as many dog biscuits as they could.

Instead of food they got an extra walk which is so much better than a biscuit, they have been getting two walks a day this weeka and are much happier dogs for it.

Happy dogs means a relaxed atmosphere and charming dogs who want to play.

My physio will be here shortly to put me through a gruelling 30 minutes of exercises.

Here she is now.

Have a good day.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009





Was in masses of pain this morning when I woke up, started crying and got very scared and worried.

After some THC could cope with the pain as the THC relaxes me vey well, this is good as it means I am relaxed enough to enjoy the day.

It also means the pain is not in total control of me, would find life so much more unbearable without the THC.

Still can’t believe THC is denied BR @ The Wheel of Fortuna.

http://spinfortunaswheel.blogspot.com/

This morning caught me out thinking about the prospect of saying goodbye to my love and best friend Richie.

Know this probably won’t happen for a quite while but just the idea of doing so makes me very sad.

As I write buckets of tears are flooding down my face which is unpleasant these days as tears irritate my skin.

Am very conscious that I have to keep control of my emotions, which is not easy to do, but can’t let myself get ruled by sorrow and fear.

Have to really keep on top of that otherwise I will be ruled purely by my emotions.

The tears keep flowing, in a way it is good as it does give me some relief, which is so important otherwise I will go mad.

Now I feel alot better for crying and writing my fears down.

Once they are expressed it all feels so much more manageable.

It means that I can enjoy the early evening now all those feelings are no longer bottled up inside me.


Attack on Teheran University.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/8104466.stm

From Tara.

From Stephany.

From Kimberly.



I have been given three great awards by three wonderful women.

The Awards are;

* The Positive Attitude Award from Tara.@Living with Multiple Sclerosis on 12 June

http://livingdaytodaywithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/

Please visit Tara; she is a wonderfully positive woman who is getting

on with her life despite and because of MS.

Her blog is about ‘ Living with Multiple Sclerosis is a daily battle. MS is the invisible disease or at least for most people. We fight many emotional and physical symptoms all the time. We need as much support as we can get. However due to the invisible symptoms we tend to not get a lot of support and that brings on more emotional stress which in return brings on more MS symptoms. A Vicious cycle.’

She also has a website called Welcome to Creative Custom Canes

http://www.creativecustomcanes.com/

Her favourite quote is

"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." Albert Einstein

A good quote to be inspired by.

On 13 June I received two more awards:
* The Compromiso Educativo Award from Stephany@:Soulful Sepulcher

http://bipolarsoupkitchen-stephany.blogspot.com/


Stephany describes herself as ‘ An open-minded free spirit. I am not a medical professional. I believe in the human spirit; that we all have untapped resources within ourselves to succeed beyond our dreams. I believe that one voice can and does make a difference.

Here is a quote that inspires her: '

‘I am on a journey. Take a walk with me. Life is short. So stand tall. "Always go too far, because that's where you'll find the truth.’~Camus

* And The Positive Attitude Award from Kimberly@Living my Life with MS.

http://myjourneywithms-kimberly.blogspot.com/


Kimberly’s blog is about her personal journey with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). Her intention is to pass along the message of HOPE. She blogs with humor and sarcasm, sometimes anger, but always honest, often brutally so. She is simply trying to make lemonade out of the lemons life throws.

Please go by these three blogs they are all very well written and from the heart.

Thanks for the awards Tara, Stephany and Kimberly hope you have a good day today.

Here are the guidelines for this award:

Post it on your blog.
Nominate others with positive thinking/attitudes.
Post links to their sites and notify them.


The Positive Attitude Award should be passed on to 5 or more as you choose.
And The Compromiso Educativo Award to one or more.


I would like to pass The Compromiso Educativo Award

To Ana @ Just Ana
http://justana-justana.blogspot.com/


The Positive Attitude Award

To Ana@Hella Heaven
http://hellaheaven-ana.blogspot.com/

To Kimmy@I Hate MS
http://noshimmykimmy.blogspot.com/

To Odd Mum Out@ Odd Mum Out
http://oddmomout3.blogspot.com/

To Lover of Life@Life in the Second Half
http://lifeinthesecondhalf.blogspot.com/

To Lauren@Living With MS
http://lauren-livingwithms-aolcomlglbgl2003.blogspot.com/

To Blinders Off@Living With MS
http://living-with-ms.blogspot.com/

To MsMichel@Lovin’Life
http://msmichel.blogspot.com/

T o Cranky@Musings of a Cranky Caregiver
http://musingsofacrankycaregiver.blogspot.com/

To Stephen@One Life Living the Dream
http://wonlife.wordpress.com/

To Princess of Snooze@ Wobbly teetering blogging
http://multiplesclerosisprincess.blogspot.com/

To Random Thinker@ Why are all the good blog names taken?
http://whyareallthegoodblognamestaken.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, June 16, 2009











Flowers on friend's balcony in Edmonton, Canada.


Woke up and seemed to successfully drift off again only to be disturbed three times by small spasms before a big spasm totally woke me up.

Not the best way to wake up and this morning I really needed to sleep abit longer but there was no way after the feeling of getting a powerful kick in the lower back.

This happens all the time when my foot suddenly jerks and often kicks out as well.

This happened ages ago when I was sitting in the wheelchair and my foot spasmed and kicked out straight at poor Spike’s nose.

Poor dog, he did not trust sitting close to me for awhile especially as I did laugh when my foot kicked him in the nose, but could not help it as the expression on his face was so funny.

This morning tried my best to block out the pain that flooded back when I became conscious but could not do anything to change my situation.

Tried very hard to drift off to sleep again but each time my shoulders and arms would feel painful and as if they would not be able to move again.

Started to cry then, softly at first but could not control my crying and found that after a few attempts I could not stop.

Not my favourite way of waking up but can't be helped as that is the reality of my situation.

Someday it all feels worse than other days; yesterday was a particularly painful day made worse by my body constantly slumping to the left and my right side trying to keep my body upright.

Richie did adjust me frequently but each time within a few minutes I was slumped once again.

Not the best way to sit and type holding on to the table or the side of the bed to keep upright and be able to keep typing.

Today after Richie readjusted me and got my abdomen quite straight so now I am more upright and not slipping over which is brilliant.

When I can sit like this it makes my life a lot easier as then I do not have to call out for Richie to help me every few minutes.

Gareth came by with strawberries and chocolate on his way to the Schipol Airport for a couple of hours which was very nice indeed, really lovely having him visit.

What I do like about Gareth coming round is he is popping by and not coming to visit me in bed.

Poor Karin, my ex volunteer friend always sat by my bed like I was dying and she’s some sort of Good Samaritan.

Made us both feel dreadful.

Not like Gareth‘s visits which are always very relaxed and relaxing, he is boarding his Plane home about now.

Although we are both very sad to see him go we do already know that he will be back in September something to look forward to.

The sun made a brief appearance while Gareth was here but has gone away again; think we will be getting the rain they have been predicting for some time.

Makes sense as Wimbledon starts next week and there is nearly always rain for the tennis and Mid Summer’s Day.

Thanks to Richie and Gareth and my neighbour Willes and not forgetting the dogs I feel a lot brighter now than I did earlier today.

Monday, June 15, 2009


Tomato plant.

Pepper plant.

Pepper plant.

Potato plant.

Gareth came round again yesterday at 14.30 and stayed until 18.30 and as always with a particularly good visit from a good friend the time just flew by and he had to leave again.

Very pleasant talking with Gareth and enjoying the delicious strawberries he brought with him and the chocolate.

I was advised to have a strawberry with a piece of chocolate which was very nice indeed; it was dark chocolate with lemon.

Yummy!

Certainly could cope with alot of visits like that.

I am in lots of pain today there are not too many parts of my body that are not painful, think my face and neck and my arms from shoulder to elbow are not painful.

Everything else hurts like hell, the discomfort is increased by the hot muggy weather so feel hot, sticky and longing for a breeze.

Trying to not focus on my pain but it is difficult to do so keep spending to much energy on it and have to adjust my focus time and again and tell myself to think about other things.

This morning realised again how little movement I have, can only lift my head and my arms.

If I want to raise abit of my body I need the handle that hangs down over the bed then I can get my shoulders off the bed.

Tried to see if I could do this on my own without the aid and could not do anything but lift my head up.

It is really strange to find myself in this situation as it is something that I have read about.

Did not expect that I would be experiencing it myself, sadly, so now I know what it is like to be very handicapped and 100 % dependant on others.

And that is not easy at all, in fact it is bloody difficult and for all concerned, took me ages to get used to the idea of someone else washing and dressing me.

Still do not like it at all, the one good thing for me is that Richie does it all and he is so good that it is much less intrusive than the agency carers

Now that I have personal experience I know how one manages, you just do, you just get on with it and hope for the best of times even in this ghastly situation.

I have managed by being myself and staying that way too, think I used to worry that everything even that would change drastically and unrecognizably.

The changes to our lives have been immense; think we are still reeling from the speed and the intensity of the progression of the MS.

The biggest frustration is not being able to do anything to change what is happening, think that is part of our conditioning.

We tend to think that anything can be solved or cured or mended, so something like MS is a terrible shock to everyone coming into contact with someone with MS.

Guess that is why some people can’t bear to be in touch, it is not they suddenly don’t like me.

No it most likely is fear and the realisation that there is nothing they can do to change things, plus the fear of confronting something that is scary.

As if there was a risk of getting MS just by being near to someone with MS, as if proximity alone would be enough.

Have lost a few people that I thought were good friends, they have all not said anything just do not get in touch anymore.

My email address is most likely on the blocked list so there really is nothing that I can do to change this state of affairs.

It is very sad.

Think that it is best to put away all ideas of changing the situation either of the MS or the ex friends and focus on relaxing and enjoying the moment.

Bloody hard to do especially today

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Enjoying life.





a>







It remains a strange situation but that is to be expected when suddenly life has changed so dramatically.

I still feel the same but am so obviously not the same and never will be again; the only thing that will happen is I get progressively worse.

What I can do now is a fraction of what I could do last year and is more than I ever will be able to do in the future.

Quite a scary thought that at some point I will lose the little that I can do now, no one none of the doctors can give me a prognosis of when or what to expect next.

Nobody knows how or when that will be and what course it will take, we are completely on our own with this.

It became clear to me that as I did not know what was happening the only way to go was to enjoy each day, to make the best of it and to really enjoy every moment.

That became clear to me on the 21 August when I was told by Ton, the nurse from the RCA that I would have to stay in bed until the pressure sore healed.

After I had cried for over an hour I realised that if I did not stop I would be hurting Richie and myself and triggering depression.

It was difficult to stop, difficult to take responsibility and not just let everything wash over me while I played the sad victim.

It was not the moment for introspection; this was the moment when it was important to devise a strategy for survival.

It is a hard situation which needs to be treated sensitively, the whole situation is so demanding that it is important we look out and support each other.

Even though it was difficult to stop crying and to not act as a victim it had to be done especially as I did not want things to be left unresolved to fester away and demoralise us.
.
Being positive was the best option as far as I could see the only viable option; my intention was to enjoy everyday.

First I pretended and very deliberately enjoyed myself until it became natural after awhile.

I found I could enjoy a variety of things like a sunny day, the sound of happy kids playing outside the house, watching the dogs playing lots of things to enjoy if you are receptive.

Glad that I decided to enjoy everything there was to enjoy especially as it is not certain what will happen next.

So really best to enjoy life while we can.

And that is what I do.

Hope everyone is having a good day today.

Saturday, June 13, 2009




The Independant.


AP Saturday 13 June 2009

A police motorcycle burns as supporters of defeated Iranian presidential candidate Mir Hossein Mousavi protest in Tehran.


Ahmadinejad win sparks clashes

Supporters of the main election challenger to Mahmoud Ahmadinejad clashed with police and set up barricades of burning tires today as authorities declared the hard-line president was re-elected in a landslide.

Opponents responded with the most serious unrest in the capital in a decade and charges that the result was the work of a "dictatorship."

Iran's supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, closed the door on any chance he could use his limitless powers to intervene in the disputes from Friday's election. In a message on state TV, he urged the nation to unite behind Ahmadinejad, calling the result a "divine assessment."

But Ahmadinejad's main challenger, Mir Hossein Mousavi, has rejected the result as rigged and urged his supporters to resist a government of "lies and dictatorship."

The clashes in central Tehran were the more serious disturbances in the capital since student-led protests in 1999 and showed the potential for the showdown over the vote to spill over into further violence and challenges to the Islamic establishment.

Several hundred demonstrators — many wearing the trademark green colors of Mousavi's campaign — chanted "the government lied to the people" and gathered near the Interior Ministry as the final count was announced.

It gave 62.6 percent of the vote to Ahmadinejad and 33.75 to Mousavi, who served as prime minister in the 1980s and has become the hero of a youth-driven movement seeking greater liberties and a gentler face for Iran abroad.

The turnout was a record 85 percent of Iran's 46.2 million eligible voters. Two other candidates received only a fraction of the vote.

Protesters set fire to tires outside the Interior Ministry and anti-riot police fought back with clubs and smashed cars. An Associated Press photographer saw a plainclothes security official beating a woman with his truncheon.

In another main street of Tehran, some 300 young people blocked the avenue by forming a human chain and chanted "Ahmadi, shame on you. Leave the government alone."

Mousavi's campaign headquarters urged people to show restraint.

Interior Minister Sadeq Mahsouli, who supervised the elections and heads the nation's police forces, warned people not to join any "unauthorized gatherings."

Earlier, the powerful Revolutionary Guard said it would not tolerate any challenges by Mousavi's "green" movement — the color adopted by Mousavi's campaign.

"I'm warning that I won't surrender to this manipulation," said a statement on Mousavi's Web site.

"The outcome of what we've seen from the performance of officials ... is nothing but shaking the pillars of the Islamic Republic of Iran's sacred system and governance of lies and dictatorship."

He warned "people won't respect those who take power through fraud."

The headline on one of Mousavi's Web sites: "I wont give in to this dangerous manipulation." Mousavi and key aides could not be reached by phone.

It was even unclear how many Iranians were even aware of Mousavi's claims of fraud.

Communications disruptions began in the later hours of voting Friday — suggesting an information clampdown.

State television and radio only broadcast the Interior Ministry's vote count and not Mousavi's midnight press conference.

Nationwide, the text messaging system remained down Saturday and several pro-Mousavi Web sites were blocked or difficult to access. Text messaging is frequently used by many Iranians — especially young Mousavi supporters — to spread election news.

At Tehran University — the site of the last major anti-regime unrest in Tehran in 1999 — the academic year was winding down and there was no sign of pro-Mousavi crowds.

But university exams, scheduled to begin Saturday, were postponed until next month around the country.

The state-run Islamic Republic News Agency reported that Ahmadinejad plans a public address later Saturday in Tehran.

Even before the count began, Mousavi declared himself "definitely the winner" based on "all indications from all over Iran."

He accused the government of "manipulating the people's vote" to keep Ahmadinejad in power and suggested the reformist camp would stand up to challenge the results.

"It is our duty to defend people's votes. There is no turning back," Mousavi said, alleging widespread irregularities.

Mousavi's backers were stunned at the Interior Ministry's results after widespread predictions of a close race — or even a slight edge to Mousavi.

"Many Iranians went to the people because they wanted to bring change. Almost everybody I know voted for Mousavi but Ahmadinejad is being declared the winner.

The government announcement is nothing but widespread fraud.

It is very, very disappointing. I'll never ever again vote in Iran," said Mousavi supporter Nasser Amiri, a hospital clerk in Tehran.

Bringing any showdown into the streets would certainly face a swift backlash from security forces.

The political chief of the powerful Revolutionary Guard cautioned Wednesday it would crush any "revolution" against the Islamic regime by Mousavi's "green movement."

The Revolutionary Guard is directly under the control of the ruling clerics and has vast influence in every corner of the country through a network of volunteer militias.

In Tehran, several Ahmadinejad supporters cruised the streets waving Iranian flags out of car windows and shouting "Mousavi is dead!"

Mousavi appealed directly to Iran's supreme leader, Khamenei, to intervene and stop what he said were violations of the law. Khamenei holds ultimate political authority in Iran.

"I hope the leader's foresight will bring this to a good end," Mousavi said.

Iran does not allow international election monitors. During the 2005 election, when Ahmadinejad won the presidency, there were some allegations of vote rigging from losers, but the claims were never investigated.

The outcome will not sharply alter Iran's main policies or sway major decisions, such as possible talks with Washington or nuclear policies. Those crucial issues rest with the ruling clerics headed by the unelected Khamenei.

But the election focused on what the office can influence: boosting Iran's sinking economy, pressing for greater media and political freedoms, and being Iran's main envoy to the world.

Before the vote count, President Barack Obama said the "robust debate" during the campaign suggests a possibility of change in Iran, which is under intense international pressure over its nuclear program.

There has been no comment from Washington since Ahmadinejad was declared the winner.

In Israel, the deputy foreign minister, Danny Ayalon, said "the re-election of Ahmadinejad demonstrates the increasing Iranian threat."

Former President Jimmy Carter said he expects no major change in Iran's policies.

"I think this election has bought out a lot of opposition to his policies in Iran, and I'm sure he'll listen to those opinions and hopefully moderate his position," said Carter after meeting with Palestinian Prime Minister Salam Fayyad in the West Bank city of Ramallah.

From Stephany.

From Kimberly.


Went to sleep very late last night, Gareth left at 12.15 and we listened to Taj Mahal

http://www.mahalo.com/taj-mahal-musician

Great program and lovely to hear Taj talking as he has a lovely voice seems quite a fellow.

This morning I woke up too quickly for my liking and it felt instantly very painful, everything that hurt yesterday was back and if anything more painful than yesterday.

OucH!

Arm and leg exercises and lots of thc and Baclofen helped as did the delicious Pakistani mango that I ate for breakfast.

Our visit from Gareth was brilliant and made a total contrast to what happened to Richie when he took Marleen and Spike to the dog toilet at the end of our street.

A man who was down by the dog toilet with an out of control dog (dog previously attacked Spike) off the lead let his dog attack Marleen.

Really out of control if the dog attacks bitches, after the dog attacked Marleen the man started shouting aggressive at Richie and tried to attack Richie who took the dogs and came home very angry and upset.

So upset that I guess if it were me I would be either organising how to get the dogs to a safe dog loo or working out how they could use our toilet.

So now he 0ios using a dog toilet up the street which is similar distance just not round the corner from us so not really the logical way to walk from our flat.

Talked to our neighbour upstairs as she knows a lot of people in the neighbourhood, she did not know much about the man, just knew he lived on our street.

Just what you do not need is an aggressive man with an aggressive dog, he seemed to be fuelled by drugs probably coke when Richie encountered him yesterday evening.

Will just have to wait and see what happens don’t like the idea of being kept from using facilities near to our building because of a knuckle dragging so and so.

On a brighter note have just been given two awards:

Compromiso Educativo Award from Stephany@:Soulful Sepulcher

http://bipolarsoupkitchen-stephany.blogspot.com/


And A Positive Attitude Award from Kimberly@Living my l/ife with MS.

http://myjourneywithms-kimberly.blogspot.com/’

Please go by these two blogs they are both very well written and from the heart.

Well I am going to enjoy today.

Have a good day too.




Friday, June 12, 2009


The Positive Attitude Award from Tara.


What a day yesterday of lows of hearing about Sherry's daughter Nicole's death
http://wordsalads.blogspot.com/
and the dog having an operation.

And the highs of a promise of a visit from a good friend from Wales
tomorrow and an award from Tara@Living with Multiple Sclerosis

http://livingdaytodaywithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/

Please visit Tara; she is a wonderfully positive woman who is getting

on with her life despite and because of MS.

She also a website called Welcome to Creative Custom Canes

http://www.creativecustomcanes.com/


Her favourite quote is

"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." Albert Einstein


A good quote to be inspired by.

Thanks for the award Tara hope you have a good day today.

I will for sure with Spike playing with me and not giving me a chance to be unhappy.

By contrast yesterday was a whole day without our beautiful Spike wanting to play all the time.

Really noticed how Marleen missed Spike as the whole day she was here but not really present.

She did not come to life until Spike was back at 19.00 last night and then she started to tease him right away.

He loved it and loved being home running around and checking everything out, when he had he seemed really happy to be here.

The vet's loved him too and Richie noticed when he took him and when he picked him up that he had not been short of a cuddle as they all seemed keen to be nice to the little fellow.

When I woke up this morning it was because Spike came trotting in the room to demand access to his water bowl.

He has a very distinctive walk Richie always calls him gunslinger as he sounds like he is wearing cowboy's spurs.

If he tried he could not be subtle, he can't pretend like Marleen will to get his toy or the bed he is sleeping on.

She will just bark and he thinks the alarm has been sounded and goes charging off while she calmly hops into the bed he left with his favourite toy in her mouth.

Ah well it is a good sunny day I did my arm exercises nice and early and Richie took all the tension out of my legs with some leg exercises and a good leg massage.

After that THC and some more TLC soon had most of the pain at bay and I could start my day in style.

Be so good to see Gareth especially in the summer usually these days he is only here in late autumn and beginning of the year.

Nice to see him over in Amsterdam this summer.

Funny how some people you always miss and others I have met here I do not even remember anything about them.

Gareth is one of the ones I will always miss; he is such a lovely person really great to have around.

Really looking forward to his visit at 6 pm today.

Yippee!

Have a good day.

Thursday, June 11, 2009














Ted and Lewis at their new home with a friend of ours.


Slept very restlessly last night think we both did as we were worried about Spike appointment at the vets.

A much earlier start today as Richie had to get Spike down to the vets for the small operation.

Poor dogs did not understand why they did not get any biscuits after 6pm last night and refused to sit with us like they always do.

And then this morning one gets taken somewhere and the other not and their whole routine gets disrupted poor dogs.

And poor us as we realised again how fond we are of our little mad dog Spikey, it was horribly quiet here today with no wee face popping up my bed wanting me to play with him every five seconds.

No strange noises emanating from his bed as he plays with his very favourite toy, no yodel of pleasure as he gets a biscuit.

I even cried a few times today was missing him so much, Richie is off getting him from the vets, in fact he rang just then to say he had got him and he was safe and well with a little plaster on his nose.

What a relief to know he will be home very soon now and I can make sure he gets his share of biscuits tonight.

Right now there are two parrots on the bird feeder which is great as they have not been here for some months now.

Knew they were still around as could hear them most days and even hear them early in the morning before the curtain is opened.

Well they are back now Spike is wearing one of those see through plastic lampshades to stop him worrying the wee wound.

He seems to be in good form if still a wee bit dopey from the anaesthetic being Spike this means he can still run around and play.

Well that’s the status quo been restored, Marleen is very happy now her playmate Spike is back.

We are happy too.

I have another focus which takes my mind off how painful it has been today and how many spasms I have had.

Funnily enough thc in combination with being distracted by Spike relaxes me so well pain has been pushed away.

Am all set for a pleasant evening with my darling anjd the two doggies.


Before posting today I went to look at blogs that have recently updated and went to Braincheese

http://brain-cheese.blogspot.com/2009/06/light-blogger-candle.html

and read that Sherry's daughter Nicole had died.

Just like Linda from Braincheese words escaped me too.

I immediately visited Sherry's blog Word Saladsthe Demyelination of Me

http://wordsalads.blogspot.com/

and learned her daughter died yesterday 10 June.

Like Linda I too will light a BLOG CANDLE for Sherry and her daughter and hope you

might also do the same on YOUR blog or, if you do not author a blog,
light a symbolic candle in your heart.

Though miles may separate us, there is more than MS that bonds us all.

That glue, my friends, is LOVE...

Peace, comfort, and LOVE to you, Sherry.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

















It’s almost party time here now, Ton, the nurse from the RCA surprised us by turning up alone at 11.45 instead of 13.45 with Doctor Stolwijk.

This was when we noticed how stressed we both were about Ton’s visit.

Not surprising that both of us slept badly and kept waking up, I was suddenly totally awake at 5 am.

Really not surprising and also for Richie, these visits are stressful events where we do not always get the news we want to hear.

Luckily the visit is done and dusted and behind us and there was the good news that it is barely one cm left open.

The new regime for the last couple of weeks is that Richie only uses a tiny bit of the tampon dressing to plug the wound and allow moisture to drain a way, the healing process is well underway now so Richie does not have to apply any prontosan anymore.

Ton is on holiday and will be back on 8 July, he expects the wound to be closed up in two weeks time when we have to call Doctor Stolwijk so she can confirm that the healing process is completed.

Really hope this is so as we have been waiting since the end of January for the moment when the wound has healed.

I think it will be August before I get outside again, have to make sure that when I can sit that I get a jacket and leg warmer bag.

Even though it will be warm I am always cold and will most likely really notice the temperature outside.

I am looking forward to it very much!
video video

Tuesday, June 09, 2009





Again when I first woke up felt good for a few seconds and then all the pains kicks in again.

It is really lovely those seconds of pain free time when I can lie here quite happily and have no pain.

Usually as I am thinking 'lovely no pain' that it starts up again, poor Spike always starts to play quite fantactically with his ball.

And if my moans go on too long he gets quite frantic trying to get me to do pleasanter things than moaning.

If only it were so easy I would switch right away and play with Spike's toy then moaning in pain.

Not my favourite pastime pain, my fingers are bad today all splayed so difficult to hit the keys with especially the correct keys.

Have already done something in outlook express and can not see my folders at all now plus have very simple buttons for create mail and reply etc.

Do not know how I get these back again, already done this before and already got a
simpler version and now again all because it is difficult to stop fingers clicking
on the wrong bits.

My hands not working well causes me lots of problems and makes keyboard work very
tiring and frustrating.

Every piece I write has loads of unwanted letters and numbers in it especially 0's
and 9's they are everywhere.

Trying to copy and paste is hilarious as I often miss my target and overshoot and get
too much or totally the wrong bit of text usually have a word document open to paste
it into and copy and paste the right section from there.

Lots of work and it requires more of that stuff I do not have called patience ARGH!

Hope that does not happen.

Playing with Spike is equally hard work as my fingers can't quite find something as

I do not get the information from my fingers as I used to.

I do not feel any difference when I touch something it all feels the same to me

which is slightly rough

So when Spike puts the ball under my armpit I can not see it and can not feel it

so the game gets quite fraught for us both.

Today my right hand is very bad dragging around pressing on all the wrong things

really not what you want could delete stuff before I knew it!

Nothing that I can do just take it easy and hope that it calms down and I can get back into typing slowly and clumsily as always.

Fingers seem to be looking more like fingers than a small handful of twigs all stuck up in a different direction.

Just to celebrate the return of the sunshine my back is hurting and my elbows are in agony oh well chances are the pain will be in my knees before too long.

Going to ignore it now and concentrate on nice things like the smoothies that Richie made from oranges, peaches, carrots and cranberry juice it w as superb.

Lunch is late and is potato scone and fried egg and slices of fried halumi (cheese from Cyprus

which you slice or cube and fry) I can smell it all so guess it will be here shortly.

Yummy!

It was really yummy too and having some thc not too long before meant I was quite

relaxed and ready to eat.

Now I am very ready for Marianne's visit look forward to seeing her on Tuesdays and

hearing how the two cats Ted and Lewis are settling down to living in their new

place with her.

The last report was last Thursday where they both ran to her when she got up in

the morning.

That was their third week there so guess it is their home now which is lovely.

It is home sweet home now for two black cats.

Monday, June 08, 2009



The Golden Heart Award

Erin gave this to me which was a wonderful surprise.

The Lemon Aid Stand.

http://thelemonaidstand.blogspot.com/

Thanks Erin.

I shall give it to:

Nadja

Living! with MS
http://ysestringer.blogspot.com/

Cathy

Navigating thee aJourney with MS.
http://navigatingthejourneyofms.blogspot.com/

Aviva
Sick Momma
http://sickmomma.blogspot.com/

Cathy
Dare to Think
http://cathy-daretothink.blogspot.com/

Lanette

Chain Reactions
http://mylifeisachainreaction.blogspot.com/


Libby

Thoughts usually with Attitude
http://libybil.blogspot.com/

Frank
Quest
http://purposequest.blogspot.com/


First collect your award from my blog.
Copy and paste and add to your blog with link to my blog.
Please pass this to 5 blogs or more that you enjoy.
Make a post and list the 5 blogs with their links and go to their blogs and invite
them to pass by your blog and pick up their award.

William Blake 'Augeries of Innocence'.










Yesterday was quite a good day especially after the pancakes which certainly brightened things up.

We both had a very relaxed afternoon and evening, Richie made fresh pasta with aubergine, tomatoes, courgette and broccoli with halumi and a sprinkling of grated Dutch goat cheese over the top.

Last night was fairly amusing TV, we watched the final of this years Apprentice, the big surprise was that the favourite did not win.

Kate, the one Ruby Wax chooses as winner came second, Ruby could not understand that as she had fallen in love with Kate.

Ruby pointed out that Kate had American teeth, which was true; Kate has an amazing set of dazzling teeth.

Surprised myself by crying again literally just before Richie switched off the light, watching him walking around doing last minute things before bed triggered that off big time.

Was thinking about walking and what that would feel like and started to cry, not surprised really as I should have left that wound in peace.

Luckily a kiss and a determination to shut the sad thoughts away and get back to the dreamy relaxed state where I wanted to be, not crying over not being able to walk.

It worked and I was went off to sleep and maybe dreamt too.

Slept until 10 am so think that it was a successful night, where I slept well after putting an old nightmare to sleep.

Sure it may come back from time to time as I am sure that I will never totally accept that I will not be walking again.

Last night received several very supportive comments from blog friends telling me that they feel I have a gift.

That is lovely to hear, I am very touched that it is seen like that and happy if I can help others.

Do think it is very mutual, the blog world and my blog friends give me such tremendous support.

This support helps me to come to terms with life as it is now; love is passed around and gets charged up as it circulates.

Mutual aid and support keeps everything going and is proof for me that we do need each other.

We need to care and support each other; there is nothing more worthwhile and important for us and the planet.

Richie looked after me very well by getting THC for me from the Vaporiser, as soon as I asked for some this morning.

Think these nipped potential problems in the bud, and meant that I did not focus on the pain and discomfort.

THC does not take away pain but it does shift the emphasis and allows relaxation which also minimises pain.

Because of the weed I have a good a life as possible given my physical restrictions and the fact that I have been in bed since the 21 August last year.

My life would not be as good without the weed as I would either be in constant pain and distress or zonked out and no longer able to take part in life around me.

Really find it hard to accept that Texas will not allow medicinal marijuana but will give BR more than enough opiates to keep him zonked and not able to take a full part in life around him.

But not allow him to use marijuana which would relax him and give him relief from pain and give him a good quality of life without having to take a whole arsenal of pills.

Please visit BR and Steve and leave them a message of support @

http://spinfortunaswheel.blogspot.com/


Find this level of inhumanity very hard to take and makes me hope for change as this is something that needs action as soon as possible.

This is something very important and vital which needs to be looked after real soon.

Pain is of course part of our human existence, it is not something that can be fully conquered but it should also not dominate our lives otherwise we do not have a life.

We can control the pain I feel with the weed which allows me to relax and have a good appetite as well as sleep well.

My life has now totally changed in the last three years; I no longer feel very dynamic but guess that is something that I have to redefine for myself.

We all need a positive self image, this you create yourself and is part reality and partly fantasy but becomes more real as you go along.

For the most part I do not feel so different from the person who went to St. Andrew’s School in Maraval, Port of Spain, and Trinidad all those years ago.

I am still endlessly curious about the people and the world around me, hope that never changes.

I am still endlessly curious everyday about the world and its people.

Sunday, June 07, 2009




Lille Diane @ …This Time Tomorrow http://www.woodstocklily.com/

gave Jase @ Fool stop http://jase-foolstop.blogspot.com/

The Wonderful Favourite Award.

These are the rules in accepting this award.

Deliver this award to eight people (or as many-few as you'd enjoy giving it to or have time to) bloggers who then must choose and deliver the award to eight more (or as many-few as you'd like to) and include the following text into the award.

"These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated.’

Please give more attention to these writers."

I really enjoy reading all the blogs I follow and hope you will too.

Some of the blogs I want to pass this on to are:

Stephany @ soulful sepulcher

http://bipolarsoupkitchen-stephany.blogspot.com/

Stan @ Is Something Not Quite Right With Stan - A Mental Health Blog

http://bipolar-stanscroniclesandnarritive.blogspot.com/

Ana @ Hella Heaven

http://hellaheaven-ana.blogspot.com/

Mark @ Just a Krusen

http://justakrusen.blogspot.com/

Erin @ The Lemon Aid Stand/

http://thelemonaidstand.blogspot.com/

Cranky @ Musings of a Cranky Caregiver

http://musingsofacrankycaregiver.blogspot.com/

Rae @ Weather Vane

http://myweathervane.blogspot.com/2009/06/personal-aide_04.html

Lille Diane @ …This Time Tomorrow

http://www.woodstocklily.com/

JC @ Lilac and Cats

http://jcatmom.blogspot.com/

Diane @ A Stellar Life

http://dj-astellarlife.blogspot.com/

Webster @ Halt Stop Forget Relax

http://hsfr.blogspot.com/

Amelia @ Life with Multiple Sclerosis

http://talesoflifewithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/

Tara @ Living Life Day to Day with Multiple Sclerosis

http://livingdaytodaywithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/


Please do not feel obliged to pass them on if that causes you stress.











Edmonton, Canada.

Woke up this morning about 10 am and was immediately very aware that everything was hurting like hell.

Richie was getting up- so asked him right away for thc which he got me.

Was enjoying watching him and the dogs playing as they do every morning when they come in to greet us.

I was enjoying watching Marleen engage Richie in a game of tug with the old pair of jeans, in knotted strips, and Spike being the commentator jumping about alongside shaking his new toy vigorously in his mouth.

One minute I was laughing and enjoying the sight and the next I was howling felt really anguished and very, very scared.

Richie came straight over and put his arms around me which made me feel safer.

Think I would have gone mad if I had been told in 2006 that I would be as handicapped as someone with Motor Neurone's disease.

Had I known in 2006 that it would be a mere three year to get to where I am now, we both would have been shocked rigid.

Remember that I thought I would be dead the day after the diagnosis and went to bed fully expecting not to wake up the next day.

But I did.

Just became more handicapped than we hoped, hoped to be able to hobble around for a few years.

Could have coped with that especially if it meant getting round the city to our favourite places.

Like the coffee shops Basjoe and Xtreme and the Paradox and Tertulia and markets like Ten Cate Markt anid the Dapper Markt and the Albert Cuyp Markt.

And the Vondel Park and the Rembrandt’s Park..

Seem to be in the similar situation as someone with MN as I can not care for myself in any physical way.

Count myself very lucky that my arms still function and my mind is good as always so that I can care for myself mentally.

Which is so important, have gone from being in pain but cheerful until the thoughts of being as handicapped as someone with MN hit me, which caused me to realise yet again that’s me now.

I am extremely handicapped, it is my reality I am the talking head whose body does not function but I am also the one who can think things through.

The one that decided to enjoy all that I could enjoy, even managed that today where I went from total panic and crying copiously to watching the dogs trying to cheer me up and Richie wishing his love could cure me and make me better.

If love could do it then Richie’s love would do it for sure, would join with him in focussing our love for each other into healing me.

It does not help my body but my mind feels better now than when I woke up.

Richie made me pancakes rolled around strawberries and drizzled with maple syrup and fruit smoothie with lots of strawberries and had already eaten a bowl of strawberries.

Feeling brighter now, brighter than the weather it is overcast and grey which may lift at 17 pm when the sun often comes out to show us what could have been if the clouds had rolled away.

Hope the clouds were not preventing the sun shining in other parts.

Have a good day lovely people.

Basjoe

http://www.hiptravelguide.com/modules.php?name=Reviews&rop=showcontent&site=1&rid=216



Tertulia

http://www.coffeeshopamsterdam.com/">http://www.coffeeshopamsterdam.com/

Paradox

http://www.paradoxcoffeeshop.com/ ">http://www.paradoxcoffeeshop.com/



Xtreme

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkkU_gkiS8g

Saturday, June 06, 2009




















It is amazing how much pain and discomfort we will all put up with, woke up this morning thinking about that.

Very quickly after waking up I felt a kick in my lower back, hate it as there is no way of anticipating when it happens, it was just after 10 am so it was obviously a wake up call for me to take the baclofen pills.

Still surprises me that my foot twitching will cause the feeling of being kicked in the back, it is horrible and painful and never quite happens when I think it will.

Every night when I lower the mattress at some point my foot will kick out and that will cause a moment of pain.

It mostly catches me by surprise and I give a little screech, the dogs are usually gone to their beds by then but often hear me and give a little answering high pitched whimper back from the front room.

Weird to think that everything still works just not how we want, my foot can twitch and move up and down and kick but I can’t stand and walk.

All because nerves are sending scrambled signals if only those messages could be unscrambled and then protected from interference.

Wonder if other people have also wondered if MS is caused by something in our environment, something that has been introduced by humans, like pollution or sensitivity to plastics.

Be horrible if that were so but hopeful once the cause were known would hope that it could be stopped.

Of course that could prove difficult if it were proven that the combustion engine caused MS, guess the ‘fat cats’ of the car industry would do everything they could to prevent this happening.

Just like the Tobacco Industry will do everything they can to stop Cannabis from becoming legal.

Mind you heard in the 70’s that various Tobacco Companies had taken out patents on their packets of Cannabis smoking mixtures for just in case.

Oh well we will see what happens usually the powerful lobby wins which I guess keeps the status quo as it is now.

What needs to happen is the development of new industry so that we are not depending on one source for our work and income.

Like the car industry instead of governments giving billions to car companies to make more gas guzzlers, why don’t they spend the money developing electric cars and engines so that industry and agriculture does not have to rely on oil.

Right off my soap box now and get on with my day had an amazing fruit smoothie for my breakfast (orange, apple, pear, carrot, cranberry juice and strawberries) and two tiny hot peppers filled with soft goat cheese at 11 am.

And lunch of roll mop herring salad with diced potatoes, beetroot and fresh parsley in sour cream at 15pm.

Felt very content afterwards listening to Radio 5 Sports commentary until it was unceremoniously cut short by them announcing that the broadcast was now stopped and you can only listen live if you have a subscription.

Not to worry I will either listen to Radio 4 or The World Service or failing that the sounds of the neighbourhood kids playing football outside the house.

Have a great Saturday.

Friday, June 05, 2009










It was a very pleasant visit with our neighbour Willes and another good friend Cecile yesterday afternoon and the pink sparkling wine and nibbles.

We had a very pleasant evening, Richie cooked a nice dinner of cous cous with a delicious mixture of tomatoes, aubergine,carrot, brocolli and fried cubes of halumi (cheese from Cyprus) and chocolate brownie for dessert.

A very yummy dinner indeed.

Slept really well, wonder if that means I need friends visiting every day with sparkling wine.

Woke up at 10 am this morning which was wonderful, had expected to wake up earlier as usual, this can be anytime between 6 and 8 am.

But 10 am, I was well pleased, as soon as I felt the pain had woken up got Richie to get me some thc and baclofen.

The leg exercises and massage really helped to take alot of tension out of my leg muscles.

Been so well looked after today, had another great fruit smoothie with orange, apple,pear,cranberry juice, carrot and strawberries.

Had toast with home made peanut butter and some rollmop herring salad with beetroot, potato and sour cream.

The weather has cooled down considerably, it was 28 degrees on Monday and has slowly come down must be about 18 degrees now not cold exactly.

But by contrast it is also it is a grey overcast day with the sun popping out briefly through the day for minutes at a time.

Got so cool mid afternoon when a dark cloud was overhead that Richie put on the heating for 10 minutes.

Well I am all set for a pleasant evening with my darling Richie.

Just want to say a special hello to Mort of Caring and Sharing and to wish him well.

Shall miss him posting on his blog but can understand that there are times when you need to do other things.

http://mortonlake-caring-and-sharing.blogspot.com/

Take it easy Mort,I shall miss your visits and comments, you are a wonderful friend.

Thanks for your friendship and support.







Recently the British news has been dominated by the furore over MPs' expenses, with politicians reporting a "plague on all your houses" mood on the doorsteps.

Labour is expected to be hit hardest by the near-universal anger among the electorate.

Voters have told the media that they are disillusioned and frustrated with the political system.

"I feel pretty much the same as everyone. They are all a bunch of crooks," said airline pilot James Flack, 33, who voted Conservative in the council elections and UKIP in the European ones.

"At the end of the day if I was to defraud the tax man I would probably lose my job, my house and go to prison."

The Government has suffered a hammering at the polls after early council election returns suggested Labour's vote was sliding.

The Conservatives had gained 18 seats while Labour had lost 23. The Liberal Democrats had gained one.

"We are looking at the mood of a nation. All the things that have happened over the last 18 months. It is diabolical how they have milked the system."

All control systems work on punishment and rewards and when there are no more rewards revolts take place.

Right now the whole UK system has been discredited, the capitalist system is bankrupt and useless, elected representatives of all major parties have been exposed as being obsessed with self-interest by falsely claiming bizarre expenses. (Cleaning the moat on a manor house, an island for pet ducks, dirty movies, etc)

People are angry and quite rightly however their anger has been diverted from anger with a democratic system that has been revealed like the Emperor to have no clothes.

The institutions of parliamentary democracy have been revealed as having no moral substance and are vulnerable to public anger.

People’s anger has to be controlled before everything is lost; this is done through a witch-hunt against Gordon Brown: The hate figure being blamed for everything.

Reducing the argument to a personality test for one man and not an inquest into an entirely discredited economic and political system.

Better to have everyone baying for Gordon’s blood and the blood of a few elected representatives than have them questioning the Westminster system and the financial gnomes who hide behind it.

Our elected reps will do everything they can to save this mass delusion of democracy; they do not want everyone to see it is all done with mirrors.

Like the Wizard of Oz it is all cunning tricks that has kept the belief in the ‘system’.

Whilst uncontrolled economic growth sustained a debt financed boom the democrat illusion could remain intact.

But now the whole economic system has been shown to be bankrupt, it worked ok for 60 odd years but now it is over…

But how could it all still work when everything relied on things going the same as always?

It could be shored up but it is on unsustainable foundations and will fail again and worse.

Products like cars have been oversold, there are enough cars I am sure to circle the globe, plus they are polluting the planet and they are using valuable fuel.

We will have shortly achieved our goal of stripping everything that we need to live for, for the sake of material wealth.

In due course the Native Indian prophecy will be reality ‘ when the last sea is poisoned and the last bee is dead then man will realise they can not eat money’

Material wealth is an illusion that can be destroyed at the stroke of a pen or a click on a mouse.

Increasingly a system based on illusion will fail to resolve problems based on realities.

The world now needs us to deal with the reality that capitalism is destroying the planet and is becoming increasingly dangerous to the people in its attempts to sustain itself.

We cannot expect it to meet our basic needs.

Growing your own food is in my opinion the most important thing we can do, this should be encouraged as much as possible.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Positive Attitude Award.



I received The Lemonade Award from Rain @ Mountain Mamma

http://rain-mountain-mamma.blogspot.com/

This is such a nice image which I saw for the first time on Erin’s blog
The Lemon Aid Stand

http://thelemonaidstand.blogspot.com/


Please Give this award to bloggers of your choice.

1) Put the award logo on your blog.

2) Nominate at least 10 bloggers that have a positive attitude.

3) Be sure to list and link your nominees within your post.

4) Let them know they have received this award by leaving a comment on their blog.

I love passing these awards on as it is great fun to bring great blogs to other peoples attention.

I understand if some people aren't into the awards so don't feel bad if you don't pass them along.

I pass them along to spread the love and to acquaint others with their blogs in the hope they will like them as much as I do.

Through the Blogs Of Note, I discovered
Richard Allen
Big Al’s Compound
http://bigalscompound.blogspot.com/

(loved the post about turning a plastic landscape pool into a Poolside Garden
Project)

FlyDragon
A Little of This and a Little of That
http://flydragon-alittleofthisalittleofthat.blogspot.com/


Lakshmi
Aspirations
http://lakven.blogspot.com/


Dave
Dave’s Sploges
http://davessploges.blogspot.com/


CrazyCris
Here and There and Everywhere
http://crazycrishereandthere.blogspot.com/

Vicki
Down the MSPath
http://vvbms.blogspot.com/

Erika
Each Day is a Present.
http://eachdayisapresent.blogspot.com/

Jase
Foolstop
http://jase-foolstop.blogspot.com/

MCW Flint
Inside Out
http://mcwflint.blogspot.com/

Mark
Journeys from a Wheelchair
http://irishsea-mark.blogspot.com/


Julie
Maybe I'm Just Lazy: One Woman's Journey Through MS and Life
http://lazyjulie.blogspot.com/


Look forward to seeing who you pass the awards on to and look forward to seeing blogs that are new to me.

Very exciting!










Really hope that on June 10 when Ton, the nurse from the RCA is here with Doctor Stolwijk that they will have some good news for us.

Starting to get very concerned about the strange posture that my body has adopted.

Really hoping that despite this I will be able to go outside as I am getting quite fed up with spending so much time in one room.

It is abit like being locked up, luckily for me I am not in solitary confinement not with my darling Richie here with me and visits from friends.

Nevertheless this would not have happened if Arca ( advisors to Amsterdam City Council)had actually listened to me when I told them time and again that I could not sit properly in the power chair.

This is now in the past and I actually do not want to talk about it, apart from to make a point to the relevant people that their penny pinching has been very expensive for me.

I have lost 9 months of my life that I will never regain.

Additionally being confined to bed has exacerbated my condition and given me some new problems as my body has become even more sensitive because of the prolonged lying in bed.

The muscles in my back are incredibly weak and of course make it more difficult for me to sit well.

My posture can best be described as sitting like a crooked banana, my hips go one way and the top of my body the other.

With abit of a corkscrew effect round the waist, this tips me slightly to the right and my left side tries to keep the balance which results in a strained left shoulder.

All of this has given me a lot of extra pain and discomfort; really hope that this year Richie and I with the support of a good friend will do our best to get a well adjusted power chair so that I can go out.

Really want to go out and enjoy being outside feeling the air and hopefully this can happen before not too long.

Would love to enjoy the summer and see something of this lovely city, shall do my best to remain positive and optimistic.

Not easy to do but will do my best to remain optimistic although at times that is difficult to do.

Shall stay as optimistic as possible first take the baclofen and drink sufficient water and get on with the day.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

/>







Repulsive Business by B.A.T.


It is dreadful what companies like BAT, British American Tobacco Company do to make exceedingly large profits.

We saw a documentary recently on BBC TV about Africa and how BAT was especially targeting African countries particularly Nigeria, Malawi and Mauritius.


In the program we saw how poor people were, that every day they did not know where their food was coming from.

Yet they were so hooked on smoking that they would part with their money for a cigarette or two or three if they had a good days work.

We saw little boys some still at school selling to their classmates and at the end of the day they would smoke the cigarettes they had earned that day.

Most sales were single cigarettes which were against WHO, World Health Organisation, guidelines.

They were widely advertising the sale of single cigarettes also forbidden by the WHO.

Tobacco kills hunger pangs but can not stop you from suffering from malnutrition and it can
give you terminal cancer.

The other horrible thing was BAT would organise a lot of music events where they gave away cigarettes and things like rucksacks and baseball hats and sweat shirts and other things all with the company logo.

Everyone wanted these wonderful gifts and the music events we saw were full of underage kids also against WHO guidelines.

It was seen as cool to go to one of these events and there was usually a sweepstake where one person won lots of money and boxes of cigarettes.

We saw such a happy winner, he and his wife were the envy of all the others who did not win, he won a lot of money and a lifetimes supply of cigarettes.

After seeing the poverty in Africa the program cut to a BAT Shareholders Meeting where all the fat cats had gathered to gloat over their fine profits.

British businessman Duncan Bannatyne (anti smoking), the man who put up the money and made the program,, who makes his money out of Fitness Clubs and Care Homes, tried to tell them about the plight of the people in Africa.

Read story on BBC site:

http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44786000/jpg/_44786059_childcigarrettes226.jpg&imgrefurl=http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7475259.stm&usg=__eNQwH_K5IDniIb6RZ7aM_kKZPMM=&h=170&w=226&sz=18&hl=nl&start=4&um=1&tbnid=PPKZR2XupEZlHM:&tbnh=81&tbnw=108&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dsingle%2Bcigarettes%2Bin%2Bafrica%26hl%3Dnl%26sa%3DG%26um%3D1


They were not interested and one by one left the meeting refusing to comment on making profits out of other people’s misery.

Ken Clark is a prominent member of the Board of BAT, he was Chancellor in Thatcher’s govt and now in Cameron’s Shadow Government.

He like the rest of the shareholders were disinterested in the fact that their product caused misery and death to many around the globe.

They did not care as long as they made exceedingly large profits.

The fact that random chance can compromise your health is one thing but to have fat cats

sitting in Boardrooms cynically planning to compromise the health of many in their attempt to make money at all costs is repulsive.

I was inspired to write this after reading an anti tobacco post 31st MAY----WORLD NO TOBACCO DAY on Joseph’s blog here is the link and you can go to his blog:

Life in Motion.

http://ptjosephrosa.blogspot.com/



Duncan Bannatyne described BAT as "the unacceptable face of British Business".

Bannatyne takes on Big Tobacco: This World is broadcast on Tuesday 1 July on BBC TWO at 2100BST.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009













Every now and then recently I have had moments when I think ‘It’s not fair’ sometimes followed by copious crying as I cry over what has happened to me.

Of course it is not fair, would it have been fairer if someone else had got the MS and not me?
Don’t think that would have been fairer for the other person.

Why should I be spared when MS is something that anyone can get?

It is like Russian roulette we can all be the ones hearing the diagnosis.

With hindsight I realise now that I have had MS for a long time just never noticed it: only noticed the other stuff that happened.

If there was something noticeable, like the time that I could not walk properly for a few weeks, when it returned I thought it was amazing and never questioned it.

And why would I? I was after all just following logic if it goes wrong keep trying and then one day it works again (so no need) to investigate that anymore.

I never questioned things like that, ok I fell over but doesn’t everyone fall over sometimes?

I am also not superstitious so did not put any supernatural meaning on things for example was very aware of words that I could have used instead of amazing such as miraculous.

Do not believe in miracles as I am convinced everything has a rational cause, I might not always understand everything but believe everything is understandable.

And what was happening to me seemed very understandable until my birthday in 2006 when suddenly my walking got much worse and with it my balance.

This was not understandable at all in fact could not understand what was happening so went to the doctor and was sent to the neurologists who sent me for an MRI.

Finally there was a diagnosis and we finally understood what the cause was of all the events that were not explainable, now we understood.

Very quickly it was clear that there was no help and support available from the neurologist who never took the time to explain the diagnosis properly.

He tried to stop us from looking on the internet promising time and again that next time he would tell us everything.

Which he of course never did, all in all have never met anyone so badly equipped to deal with people.

We both independent of each other explored the Net for answers to our questions and we both found a lot of information.

There is a hell of allot of information but difficult to find out the information that has been tried and tested.

There is a lot of stuff about diets and of course there are those that offer cures (that appeal to our vulnerability but) of course have no basis in fact.

After researching MS and diets for awhile a writer friend of mine suggested I get a blog and write about what was happening to me.

This seemed a brilliant if somewhat scary idea which I fully embraced when I could not go swimming at my local pool.

It has just been rebuilt at huge cost and was receiving huge subsidies to make it accessible and when it opened the disabled access was not ready and would not be finished for at least 6 weeks.

The disabled access was round the back, none of this was exactly in the spirit of the law on access.

I immediately started my blog and quickly derived great benefit from being able to express myself and ventilate all my emotions about the diagnosis and the disease.

Later on I found other MS blogs which gave me a tremendous boost, rememeber the first time someo0ne put a comment on one o0f my posts.

Wow that was quite something, at first did not dare to leave comments on blogs but gradually did and quite quickly got to know some bloggers.

Now can not imagine a day without posting on both my English as well as my Dutch blogs as well as posting photos on a blog for the dogs and one about diets and one Not in this house for other writing.

These day can’t imagine a day without reading other peoples blogs and putting comments on theirs and receiving comments back.

Really love the support and encouragement that I get from the blog world and love the fact this is totally reciprocal.

The Internet and blogs are real tool for communication which we need so that we can support each other by communicating our stories to each other.

Those stories are important they help us understand each other’s situation and what the challenges are that are being faced.

Monday, June 01, 2009







It is Whitmonday today or Pinksteren here in Holland or Spring Bank Holiday in England.

A beautiful sunny day and for once very calm and relaxed outside, the odd game of football briefly opposite the Fijnhout theatre.

There were some young men singing, badly out of tune, and one was playing a guitar.

Very colourful glad they went off to give pleasure in other parts of Amsterdam as right here they were casting their pearls before swine.

I am having a good day, slept until 9 am and then managed despite the pain returning with conciousness to doze which I did until Richie woke me up when he got up again.

After Richie had a coffee my legs were exercised and massaged, three bags of thc later I felt alot better and adjusted the bed to a semi sitting position and took the baclofen and drank 1/4 of a liter water.

Some time later Richie brought in a breakfast of pancakes filled with fresh strawberries and maple syrup drizzled over and smoothies from apple, pear, orange, kiwi, strawberry and carrot.

We both enjoyed this breakfast very much and I feel abit like a boa constrictor now thats just feasted and needs to sleep for a month afterwards,

I plan to really enjoy today, first am going to go past some blogs on my blog link list especially the ones that I have just passed the awards onto and this blog I just found on Rhapsody's blog

http://mydiversekitchen.blogspot.com/



Have a good day.





Have recently had three awards from three wonderful women



One Lovely Blog Award from Lille Diane

…..This Time Tomorrow...
A creative blog for people like myself who procrastinate AND are perfectionists.(More of us like this out there than you think) My blog chronicles a list of 101 things I want to do and my journey getting them done. Kinda like hanging my undies out there for all to see. Will she or won't she get them done? By this time tomorrow I'll be one day closer to being there...

http://www.woodstocklily.com/2009/05/jammin-this-time-tomorrow.html#comment-form



Kreativ Blogger Award from Nat

London Calling
She lives in Charlton, South East London and works in Mayfair (W1)
and thinks London is one of the greatest Cities... followed by New York.
She also lives with MS.

http://beansmail.blogspot.com/



And Inspirational Blogger Award from Amelia

Tales of Life with Multiple Sclerosis
In 2002 I got the earth shattering news that I could possibly have Multiple Sclerosis. In 2003 that news was confirmed. I was 29 years old. I wanted to start this blog to go over the last few years of dealing with this illness and look forward to the future as it happens. If I can give hope to just one person, that life isn't over when you get life changing news, then this will have been worthwhile!

http://talesoflifewithmultiplesclerosis.blogspot.com/


Blogs I would like to pass these awards to are:


Inspirational Blogger Award to;

Charisa

Charisa Wernick

http://charisawernick.blogspot.com/


Julia

Go Big Green.

http://julia-gobiggreen.blogspot.com/


I am a free man

Sceptical Eye

http://www.skepticaleye.com/


Joseph

Life in Motion
http://ptjosephrosa.blogspot.com/


Bent Society: The Origin of Curmudgeonly Criminology - is feared by the bad and loved by the good!
In England, a Growing Band of Concerned and Dedicated Undercover Criminologists, Sociologists, Other Academics and Upstanding Citizens Write Pointed Posts and are Ever Ready to Write for What is Right by Looking into the Bent Side of Everything in Modern Britain. Find Out More in this Healthily Sceptical Blog on Tartuffians, Crimemongers and Other Unsavoury Elements.

http://bentsocietyblog.blogspot.com/


Kreativ Blogger Award to:

Desi

Desi van Zyl Photography

http://desivanzylphotography.blogspot.com/


Indigo

Scream Quietlyl

http://deafscreams.blogspot.com/


Erika C
Each Day is a Present
Awakening into our humanity through the arts and in daily living.
http://eachdayisapresent.blogspot.com/2009/05/last-concert-of-season.html#comments

Lille Diane

This Time Tomorrow
http://www.woodstocklily.com/


Garry

Cowboy Poet
http://lonecowboy-garrygarrison.blogspot.com/



One Lovely Blog Award;

Michael
Perspective Is Everything
Living with a disability - What a blessing. Thoughts and lessons learned along the way. Written by Michael B. Gerber
http://mgerber.blogspot.com/

KParthasarathi
Random Thoughts.
http://kparthas.blogspot.com/2009/05/proximate-cause.html?showComment=1243202660362#c7082947428279533851


Rhapsody

Rhapsody Phoenix
http://rappingonamelody.blogspot.com/

Blue

The Blue Cafe
http://bluenblogi.blogspot.com/


Nikina

Nik’s Backyard
http://niksbackyard.blogspot.com/


I had great fun passing these awards on hope you do too.