Woke up quite gently this morning and lay here quite enjoying the sounds from outside.

Then started getting a touch melancholic and next thing I was crying and the tears were running down my face my ears were getting wet.

Put the bed into a half sitting position this also made it easier to stop crying that and regulating my breathing.

It is true though that when you are lying down and you cry you find it harder to stop than sitting up.

Luckily did not wake my darling which I was very happy about.

As soon as I had recovered my composure I did the arm and back exercises and tried not to make too much noise in the process.

Don't think it was sucessful think I sounded like an old steam train trying to ascend a large mountain.

Just after the exercises were done and as I was falling deeply asleep heard Richie getting up turned out it was 10.15 already.

Richie got himself a coffee and some thc for me, I stopped drinking coffee before I had the catheter as coffee makes you pee alot and I was constantly under estimating the effect of coffee.

Plus at the time had carers coming in who were very bad, they regularly did not come on time or just did not come at all.

One time one 'carer' left me in the lurch twice in one day and it ended up with urine flowing out of the bottom of my chair because I could not hold it any longer.

Finally the 'carer' who should have come round at 12 noon and 14pm came round at 15.30 and then she was so dreadfully clumsy with the hoist that she hurt me badly which caused huge spasms in my legs and shocks to the lower back.

And during all this fumbling I had pissed again and was not a happy girl!

Luckily a good friend came round and saved the day, despite never having any knowledge of the hoist.

She put the lifting harness expertly round me and under my legs and hoisted me up removed trousers and knickers and showered me and got me clean and dry knickers and trousers.

What a woman!

Still so glad Richie is looking after me as he does it so very well in comparison to the Home Care experts we have had here.

Richie does it all very carefully with the minimum of pain and discomfort,mind you every little movement can and does hurt so it is very difficult to move me without hurting me.

Luckily they do not come here now, took awhile to recover from the trauma certainly took the dogs longer as they got very upset with the never ending flow of strangers.

The staff are not to blame it is the result of the new policy of getting rid of qualified staff and hiring staff without training on a very low wage.

This is Government policy for the Home Care Industry which then can only provide a low level of care.

Since the qualified staff have mostly all gone now there are heaps of Home Care Bureaus popping up all over the place.

Staff come and goes quick as they are always on the lookout for a job with more money.

Luckily all that is in the past now and I am no longer at the mercy of yet another Home Care bureau.

Happy days!

Weather is wonderful going to enjoy it now.