Thursday, April 16, 2009
Went to sleep very quickly last night and slept until I heard Richie close the window at which point I was sadly wide awake.
Very painful arms and legs as well as a very tight MS girdle today, did my arm exercises right away.
Then Richie worked his leg massage magic and got me the first of three lots of baclofen and a bag of thc vapour.
Instantly the thc relaxed my muscles which reduced the pain and as I become totally relaxed all the pain and discomfort fades into the background again.
Found it more worrying then when I did not know what the tight feeling round my middle was, now just think to myself oh the MS girdle.
Sounds nonchalant but that hides a hatred of this disease and the fact it has taken so much of my life away from me.
Wish I did not know anything about this horrible disease, the idea of having a dibilitating disease that baffles the experts and is not a comfort to MS sufferers.
Still glad I decided that I will be making the most out of this awful situation, that is better than getting depressed.
It has been difficult to keep positive when this disease has taken so much from me, like my working life, my self image,and even my sexuality.
Really taken all the important things in my life and it is important that I find other things to replace the loss.
Glad I decided that I would be positive and not get dragged down by negativity, this is something that I have to reconfirm everyday.
It is important for me to stay positive and to try to refind myself and the meaning of my life after the devastation of the MS entering our lives.
Very important to enjoy everything everyday.